Doors That Can't Be Closed
by finalitylife
Summary: Always remember to close the door behind you after you leave. Who knows what will get in because of our ignorance, who knows what the consequences will be.
1. Chapter 1

1A/N: Why did I write this? I don't know. Is my mind far too chaotic for its own good right now? More than likely. Either way this is the first chapter of hopefully a new story. It will as always go with my style of writing, though will probably stick with the darker themes like Finding Hope Again but I don't know for sure. Still in progress. Anyways, let me know what you think.

Doors That Can't Be Closed

By: FinalityLife

I am tired, so very tired yet I know sleep will not come because I will not let it. Weariness has crept deep into my bones, my mind and has no desire to leave. How many days has it been since I slept, three? seven? Twenty? I have no idea anymore, I just have no damn idea anymore. The brightness of my room is beyond uncharacteristic for me, yet I will make no effort to darken it to the illumination which I prefer. If the light goes, then he returns, and if he returns, the pain, the torment returns, and the worst part is that no one...no one will believe me. Starfire will look upon me with fear, like I am some type of dangerous lunatic, and if someone so wonderful as her could look at me with such a look, then maybe I really am insane. I laugh strangely to myself for thinking such a thought. I am not insane, never have been, never will. The problem is that I am far too sane for a world that breeds only madness. I see the truth when no one can, and for that reason, I am being punished, being tortured until I see no more.

They refuse to believe he is still alive, refuse to believe that he hasn't finally been removed from our lives to allow us some peace. How can they be so foolish to believe such a thing. Nightmares do not fade away so easily because as long as there is darkness, there will be a place for them to hide, and wait, and in the end, strike to claim back what is theirs. That is why the lights always stay on when I am alone, that is why the night is no longer my friend because I finally know the truth and it is slowly destroying me.

They all think I am okay, that my 'hallucinations' are gone and that everything can go back to the way they were but things weren't okay before and are now only worse. They all believe in a powder on a forgotten relic of a dead fiend, I believe in the truth. He is out there, just beyond my reach, hidden within the shadows of the ignorance of my friends. They refuse to see, and in the end, only serve to damn my existence. I hold my hand up in front of my face, it shakes only slightly, the only side effect of the injections I give myself to stay awake. My nerves are frayed but that only means I am still awake, still safe, safe from him.

If I tried to make them understand, they would only turn their backs on me. Beast Boy and Starfire would be terrified of me, Cyborg would view me as a dangerous threat, and Raven...Raven...I clench my head in my hands. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know! I feel my breathing quickening, my pulse rasing as I fight back against my weary mind for control. I can not lose it now because if I do, I will lose everything.

Even in the light, I can feel his cold, gray eye on me, watching my every move, waiting patiently for me to make a mistake, and then he will take back what he believes to own, he will take back his apprentice, his wayward "son". I won't let it happen, I will not go back to being beneath his cruel fist. I will not fail even if I have to do it on my own.

They will never believe me, will never believe that he still comes from the darkness to hurt me, still appears to mock, ridicule, and torment. It is too much for them to believe because he is dead, gone, so they can all live in piece without the dagger dangling over there heads. As always, they leave me to what they believe is my dark brooding in my room, unaware that I am huddles in a single corner of my room that is filled with unending light from every angle. They are unaware of the battle I must fight daily to survive. If I asked for help, they would think I am crazy, lock me away where they would believe I could get help but only serving to hand me over directly to his grasp. Without help, I know it is only a matter of time before I fall, before my concept of reality falters just enough for him to get me, but I will not fall easily. I've survived too much, endured far too many brushes with dead to break so easily.

Again I laugh to myself as I continue to clutch my head in my hands, a very strange laugh, a deranged laugh indeed. What foolish words of my own I speak. I did break and it took the last second intervention of a black bird to save me, yet even that bird will no longer help me. They can not see what I do, can not see the hand reaching out for my very soul, and I know, without help, without an answer to my problem very soon, I will be no more. What will be left, I don't know, but it will be nothing good, nothing pure, nothing that will be allowed in the light ever again.

A sudden flash hits my eyes and I suddenly find myself in complete and total darkness. The light is gone, in an instant, I am alone in the one realm I fought so hard not to be, the realm of nothingness. I can feel myself start to hyperventilate, a pitiful reaction of a once fearless and powerful super hero, but that was before him, before his never ending gaze that follows me where ever go. I frantically scan the room, birdarang clutched tightly in my hand, looking for him, awaiting his appearance. On the far side of the room, where in the light there was nothing but a wall he appears. A single eye appears, as if it suddenly just opened, the white parts making it painfully visible in the blackness. Slowly, an armored form emerges from the darkness and a sinister laugh echoes around the room. I can't help but try to cover my ears, trying to block out the horrifying sound. I do my best to silence it but his voice finds a way to be heard.

"Come now Robin. Did you really think you could stay away from me forever? I think not. You are mine, you have always been mine and I will have back what belongs to me." He begins to advance on me and I ready myself for a reoccurring fight that I know I can not win...not on my own.

Raven slowly floated down the darkened hall, heading toward their leaders room. Cyborg had called her informing her that the power had gone out in the tower, some type of glitch in his supposed perfect system. He had told her it would be back in a little bit but that Robin had not answered his communicator and he was hoping she would inform him of the situation. She had almost straight out said no to the favor but something prevented her from doing it, and had in the end, reluctantly agreed and here she was heading toward her destination.

Raven had noticed Robin had been acting the slightest bit off lately. Of course she always noticed the little differences in his behavior each and every day. She didn't know why but she enjoyed watching him, observing him and his interactions with the others. He was so complex yet so straight forward with so many things. He was an interesting person to study.

She had noticed that hee was just a little bit jittery which was not normal for the confident, fearless leader of the Titans and she did not like seeming him that way. She noticed it months ago, following the tragic episode with Terra, and then even more after..after the incident, but he should have gotten better, shouldn't he have? She got the strangest sensations from him when he was close, a result from her encounter with his mind. They were dark, distorted feelings, things that for all she knew could have always been within their mysterious leader but only now could she completely sense them, the barrier of his mind slightly cracked open because of her allowed entry into his mind, if only for a few seconds.

Raven found herself in front of Robin's door, and quietly knocked on the cold steel, awaiting a response. After about 30 seconds, when she received no response, she knocked again, slightly harder. She heard movement inside and what sounded like heavy breathing. She wondered what he was doing and just hoped it was nothing inappropriate. She blushed slightly at the thought before suddenly hearing something crash over in Robin's room, something heavy and loud, and became slightly panicked. What if he was in trouble? Going against her instincts, she phased through Robin's door, invading his privacy that she respected so much, ready for anything. The second she came back to form on the other side, dozens of lights suddenly popped on, burning into the dark empath's eyes as they were only used to darkness and low light. The light was so intense that she fell back against the door, trying to block the light from her eyes. She could hear heavy breathing in front of her and she recognized it as Robin. She managed to get out a few words.

"Robin, could you please turn off some of these lights, its too bright." His response was stern and slightly unnerved.

"Never." Nothing else was said but she could feel something wrong in this room, something wrong with him, something she had not felt since the incident with the mask though this was a far stranger feeling, that found a way to send a small chill up her spine. It felt like eternity but her eyes finally adjusted to her surroundings on the disheveled form of her leader in front of her. He was tightly clutching a birdarang and was still breathing heavy. He looked like a mess, he looked...pathetic. It made her feel bad to think of him that way. He was the one who was always strong, always in control, well almost always. Again she thought back to the incident feeling her heart tighten for a second. The Titans had almost lost him that day, she had almost lost him that day.

Despite his mask, she got the feeling he was searching around the room for his eyes, looking for...she didn't know. Could he be having some type of relapse? That thought worried her tremendously. She did not want to see something like that happen to him again. He had barely survived once, she didn't know if his mind could survive it again and she didn't want to lose him. Raven realized she was having very strange thoughts floating through her head but chose to ignore them for the time being because of the situation at hand.

"Robin?" She felt his eyes fall upon her though he didn't say anything.

"I came here to tell you the power went out due to a glitch but it looks like Cyborg already took care of it." No response.

"So I will be going back to my room unless there is anything you would like to discuss." No response. Raven stared at the ebony haired young man for a few more seconds, studying his form before slowly turning around, and opening the door. She did not want to leave the room because something...something continued to feel terribly wrong with that room...with Robin. However, it was apparent Robin was not going to reveal anything and she knew, she would probably have done the same thing, she had done the same thing on many occasions. She had more secrets than anyone else in this tower, terrible, terrible secrets. Very reluctantly, Raven floated out the door, but not before giving one more look back at Robin. For the briefest of moments, his face almost looked like it was asking her not to go, pleading for her not to go, but whatever she had seen was quickly gone, replaced with what she could only describe as a mistrusting indifference. It bothered her to get that look from him. She always believed that if Robin truly trusted anyone it was her and she enjoyed that fact but that look, what was that look about.

As the door shut behind her, once again leaving Robin to his solitude and whatever problem he had, Raven couldn't help but become tremendously worried over one other little detail she had noticed. On the visible part of Robin's right arm was a bruise in a particular shape. It looked as if someone had grabbed his arm with such tremendous force that each individual finger and part of the hand had left distinct bruises. She knew those had not been there earlier today and he had not left the tower as far as she knew. However, what worried her the most, was that the spacing of the bruises could have only been caused by the hand of a full grown man.


	2. Chapter 2

1A/N: This story will not be a long one as things will move quickly. This chapter is not as good as the first, but it really is exposition and transition so what do you expect.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans, but hey, I think we all knew that already

Doors That Can't Be Closed

Chapter 2

By: FinalityLife

Raven had left the brief presence of Robin but he had not for one second left her thoughts, her concerns, but of course she realized that had been the case when it came to him for a very long time. Robin had always had a unique ability to get himself into trouble whether it was minor instances with Jonny Rancid or nearly fatal situations with...with him. The closer Raven had become to Raven since she had met him, she found herself, despite her best efforts and near perfect control of her emotions, caring deeply for the troubled young man. This is what had brought her back to her room in her half meditative, half contemplation position on her bed.

He had not recovered from his experience with the mind altering dust that had invaded his body, it was the only explanation. Nothing else could drive Robin into such a state, make him look so weak, so vulnerable. The dust had broken his body, broken his mind, and it seemed it would not relinquish its hold on him even now. It was slowly eating away at him, slowing taking away his sanity, and Raven was not sure if she could help him. She had been in his mind once but it seemed as if it had not helped him at all, only served to prolong his suffering, and now...now...she just didn't know.

Raven knew, without a doubt, that the team would never survive without Robin as their capable leader, it had been proved long ago when the H.I.V.E first made their appearance. She also hated to admit it because she knew just how selfish it sounded, but she believed, deep down, that more importantly, she didn't know if she could make it without his guidance, his unfailing belief in her, his comforting presence. With the multitude of emotions flowing through her, Raven was surprised nothing was being destroyed around her but of course she remembered one important fact. She had been blessed as of late, though she hated to think of that word in relation to herself. Half-demons were never blessed. Her powers had been in almost complete control, her emotions no longer bringing immediate wrath on some inanimate object. She almost felt like she could feel freely for brief seconds of time but she wasn't quite ready to test that theory. It saddened her to think that as she was being given this small gift, Robin was falling down. It was the balance of the universe. For one good thing, there was always some bad thing, it just happened to be made abundantly clear right in her home, right down the hall, with probably the closest person in the world to her.

He was the first one she could ever call friend, he was the first when she came to this place to not look at her strangely or question her behavior. He had simply accepted her as she was and she hated to admit it, but that truly had meant a lot to her all that time ago, it still did. It would always mean so very much to the dark empath.

Raven suddenly jumped to her feet, finally deciding that she needed to confirm something before pursuing anything. She only hoped that Cyborg was still awake. She grabbed her cloak, throwing it around her body before heading toward where she hoped he still was. She got there very quickly. Anyone who would have seen her would have thought she was rushing toward something of great importance or running from something truly terrible. She spotted Cyborg near the main energy station, sparks shooting from one of his fingers that doubled as a blow torch. He did not notice her shrouded form floating a few feet behind him. He noisily slammed the section he was working on mock dusting his hands off.

"There all fixed. What am I saying, this thing is better than ever. Boo-y..." As he was saying his trademark line he turned around to find the dark form of Raven which more than greatly surprised him. He let out a yell rather than finishing his phrase. Raven didn't even flinch nor did she say anything.

"Geez dark girl. You scared the hell out of me. I mean I know you enjoy doing that to Beast Boy but come on, why me?" Raven smirked on the inside at Cyborg's comment. He was right though he had only been joking. She truly did enjoy appearing out of nowhere and surprising the normally obnoxious prankster.

"So what can I do for you little lady? You obviously needed something if you came all the way down here this late to see me." Raven remained quiet for a few seconds, mulling over exactly how to ask what she needed. She spoke, doing her best to sound as neutral as possible, not wanting to sound as worried as she really was. Blunt and straight forward was what she decided.

"I just wanted to ask a question. Is it possible that Robin is still being affected by the dust from Slade's mask?" Cyborg's face showed nothing for a second before a strange grin crossed his face.

"Well I definitely wasn't expecting that question but there is no way Robin is still being affected. I checked him out completely, ran every test I know, hell I even created a few new tests personally to check him and he's completely clean." He paused for a second. "Why did you want to know anyway?"

"Have you not noticed him acting strangely as of late?" The words came out slightly in disbelief though Raven hid it well. How had he not noticed anything?

"Well lets see, spending almost every moment hiding in ones room...that definitely sounds like someone I know." He smiled largely as he took a shot at Raven though she only grimaced. She couldn't figure out why Cyborg seemed to not take her concerns serious at all, pretty much dismissing them from the first words.

"Look Raven, I don't see anything going on with Robin and I figured if there really was, Starfire would have already said something to all of us. You know that girl goes crazy worrying about him even if he's only sneezing." Raven couldn't help but agree with Cyborg's logic though the thought of Starfire hanging all over Robin gave her a strange feeling in her stomach. She barely noticed as Cyborg walked past her, pausing for a second next to her as he left.

"Its too late to be worrying about nothing Raven. Go to sleep. Everything always looks better in the morning," and with that, Cyborg was gone. Raven remained there for a few more seconds, finding it difficult to argue with Cyborg's words but unable to shake the feeling of wrongness that seemed to be creeping from everywhere around her. She slowly shook her head as she suddenly felt tired. Cyborg had been correct, it was time for some sleep and just maybe, in the morning, she would be greeted by a smiling Robin at the kitchen table.

Robin P.O.V:

So very cold, yet I can feel my insides burning. Once again the lights of the room burn bright yet all I can feel darkness. He came again for me, he came again to bring the suffering that only he can inflict on my very soul. The scars he has left on me have always found a way to go far deeper than any physical wound. Now, however, things have gotten worst. The lights continue to penetrate every corner of my room, yet he has not left. I can still hear his whisperings in my mind, his malevolent voice taunting me, telling me things that can't possibly be true, though I can feel a small part of me beginning to find some truth in his words.

He tells me they are all against me, that they are not truly my friends, most especially Raven. I feel myself clenching my fists tightly as I remember just how casual Raven had been, how emotionless and indifferent she had acted. Could she see nothing! My laugh sounds slightly off even to my ears. Of course she saw nothing. I must have given the bruises to myself. I must simply be acting like my usual paranoid and delusional self. She saw nothing because she just doesn't care...she doesn't care. He only agrees with me every thought. I begin slamming my skull against the wall I sit against, trying to silence the voice, despising how much my thoughts mirror his. One, twice, three times, the sound of bone crushing up against steel echoes in my room, in my head, succeeding in drowning out his laughter, but only through a few brief seconds of pain.

My whole body begins to tremble, but I have grown used to the occasional full body tremor. Though my hands shake almost constantly due to the drugs in my system, this is something far worse to withstand. Though it is my body that shakes, it is my mind that suffers. When they come, it feels as if my brain is trying to split itself in half, trying to rip its very way from my own head. I curl up as best as I can, trying to maintain some control of my limbs. Another strong tremor tears through my body, my head once again making strong contact with the metal of my wall. I see darkness for just a second in my vision, panicking instantly coursing through my entire being. The strange seizure finally stops and I scramble for control, scramble for what lies within my belt. My hand finally grips tightly around the syringe, a wave of relief passing briefly through me. I quickly inject the contents into my arm, a renewed strength and vigor almost instantly hit me. These strange "attacks" always make me incredibly tired and only the injections help keep me from embracing the darkness. I sit myself up back against the wall, resuming my careful watch of my surroundings. I now nervously fidget with a birdarang in my hand, eyes never stopping their search for the slightest movement, for the slightest sign of anything coming near me. I am afraid, I am desperate, and I feel so much resentment toward my so-called friends who blatantly refuse to see the truth and help me. Damn you, damn you all. Time continues to march forward, though nothing ever changes in a room full of light when the mind is consumed by shadow.

Reviewer Responses:

**casui: **Thanks for the review and glad you like the story so far. This story may not actually turn into a R/R coupling though it will focus almost entirely on the two characters. Haven't decided yet. Oh and most things will not be what they seem in this story, well at least I hope to make it that way.

**lolopixie: **Nice to get a review from you again since they are always good.I was quite proud of the first chapter with the way it went with Robin so I'm glad you enjoyed it.Yeah I try to avoid cliffhangers though sometimes they really do serve a great purpose.

**BigBlackWoman: **Yeah I've decided to continue writing this story so lets hope it all works.

**Cherry Jade: **Well you asked nicely for another chapter and how can I possibly say no to you. So lets hope it meets up to your standards and for the record, this story is going to be a strange one, so be prepared for anything. Peace.

**evilsangel: **Thanks for the review. Sorry for the delay. Lots of things been coming up lately that were completely unexpected.

**Kashira Hibana: **Glad you enjoyed the first chapter and of course thanks for every review you've sent me. I'm doing my best to continue one particular story that I know you can't wait for but its slow moving and I didn't like what I had done so far in the sequel so kind of back in the story board area. So I hope everything else Im writing is enough for now.

**ravenrogue9: **Here's the update. Hope it didn't take too long and you enjoyed this chapter.


	3. Chapter 3

1A/N: Yup...Got paranoia? I do. Oh and thanks for all the reviews and I apologize for not getting around to this sooner...I think.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans, but hey, I think we all knew that already

Doors That Can't Be Closed

Chapter 3

By: FinalityLife

Raven awoke the next morning and instantly knew that her worries and the strange feelings she kept feeling had only increased over the few hours of sleep she had managed to get. Though it had been difficult for her to fall asleep, her rest had fortunately been a dreamless sleep. No nightmares, no apocalyptic visions, nothing. It was a rare occurrence indeed for the young woman and couldn't help but feel guilt again, that things were going so well for her while Robin was slowly fading away. Again the thought of Robin caused her heart to clench, as the image of that cold look he had given her when she had left last night still lingered in her mind. She felt herself shudder slightly as she peeled off her leotard, as if the room had suddenly dropped twenty degrees but she was probably just imagining it. She needed a nice relaxing, warm shower before she started this day.

A half hour later, a fully dressed and awake Raven found herself floating toward the kitchen. It was still early in the tower and she knew that everyone would still be asleep, with usually the exception being Robin of course. It was common for her to find him already in the kitchen, reading the newspaper and furthering his addiction to coffee in the morning. On occasions, she would try to convince him to try some tea but he always had the same retort. He didn't need to be relaxed in the morning, he needed to be alert in case something happened. It was a sound argument for the young man who almost never left his duty, never stopped being ready for the next great threat. She respected him greatly for that fact though even she had to admit he took life far too seriously almost all the time. Even Raven allowed herself moments of leisure with her books. The rest of the mornings between Robin and Raven usually consisted of comfortable silence before the chaos of Starfire, Beast Boy, and Cyborg invaded the kitchen. Things tended to get messy once the rest of the Titans showed up and Robin would always give her that one particular look, that knowing smile that told her this was the reason he needed his coffee. Despite herself, Raven found a smile creeping on to her face at the thoughts but whatever small smile was there was gone once she found the kitchen completely vacant, no sign that Robin had even been there. She felt her face fall, a rare display of disappointment from her, but no object so much as cracked in her vicinity, the good fortune continuing for her though at this time, it was just simply irrelevant to her.

Raven went about silently making her tea, the only sound was the whistling of the kettle to signal the water's readiness. She poured herself a cup and sat down in her usual seat, taking a soothing sip of her favorite brand. She allowed the aroma to linger in her senses for a prolonged few second before exhaling a deep breath. What was she to do?

Hour after hour slowly rolled by for Raven and strangely enough, none of the other Titans had appeared yet. This gave Raven a rare, completely silent morning but she could really care less about that. Today, she had wanted to see everybody, to maybe ease her concerns by trying to subtly see what Starfire and Beast Boy thought about Robin's situation. A nearby clock continued to tick on, second by second, and Raven found her foot impatiently tapping, it seemingly echoing loudly around the room. Eventually she had enough and pushed herself away from the table standing to her feet. This was completely ridiculous to her. Where was everybody?

Raven found herself floating toward Cyborg's room, intent on finding why nobody else had woken up yet. She eventually found herself in front of his door and could feel him inside the room but what was strange enough was that she could easily recognize two other people in the room with him. She was at a complete loss as to why Starfire and Beast Boy were with Cyborg at this moment. She eventually pulled her thoughts back to the door in front of her and knocked on it. After a few seconds, the door slid open, Cyborg's massive bulk standing in front of her.

"Its about time you got here Raven. I really didn't want to start without you but I was going to if you didn't get her soon." Raven hid the absolute confusion she was feeling right now as it was a simple fact she had no idea what Cyborg was talking about. She glanced around the room, her eyes settling on Starfire and then Beast Boy. Starfire had her arms wrapped around herself, and her head hung down with a sad look on her face. Beast Boy was just as strange, having a solemn and serious look on his face. Neither of them met Raven's gaze.

"Are you going to come in Raven?" It was more a statement than a question, and Raven slowly floated in. She floated a few feet away from everyone, still very unsure of what was going on.

"When I talked with you an hour ago Rae, you said you'd be right there. Lose track of time in one of your books again?" This time Raven couldn't hide the confusion on her face at Cyborg's statement. She hadn't talked to Cyborg, she was sure of it. Before she could make any response, Cyborg went on with what he had to say.

"Alright guys, I really didn't want to call this meeting but after talking with you two," Cyborg looks at Starfire and Beast Boy, "I felt it was necessary. Maybe you haven't noticed Raven but Robin has been attacking very strange as of late and when I mean strange, I mean really out there." Raven was sure her eyes widened considerably at these words. She had talked to Cyborg last night about this exact same thing. What was going on. Beast Boy's voice however cut in once again before she could say anything.

"Of course she wouldn't have noticed. She barely ever leaves her room." Raven turned to Beast Boy, unable to deny the cold tone he had used when he talked about her. His eyes were now dead set on her and for the first time ever, Beast Boy made her fidget and not the other way around.

"Please friend Beast Boy, it is not Raven's fault she does not care for Robin as I...I mean we do." Raven felt her head snap over to Starfire, who was stilling holding herself as if she was cold, her head still hanging.

"Everyone calm down. I called this meeting so let me do the talking for now." Silence. "Alright, about Robin. At first, I was going to chalk his slight disturbing behavior up to the dust that infiltrated his system but trust me I can tell you without a shadow of a doubt, he is clean from that." Raven could see the strong conviction Cyborg had in his words in his eye and she found herself unable to doubt his words though she wanted to. Everyone else seemed to nod.

"What I am afraid of guys is that the whole experience left him unhinged. Robin was never the most stable guy to begin with, we all know that, and I think that this whole thing sent him over the edge, his mind just couldn't handle it. What concerns me now, is if Robin is still fit to lead us and another very important question...Is Robin a danger to us and himself?"

"Nooo!" Everyone turns to look at Raven, her uncharacteristic outburst of emotion causing everyone to raise an eyebrow. Raven yelled at herself within her mind and did her best to compose herself, despite almost everything that has been done or said since she had entered this room leaving her very unsettled and very confused. She clears her throat slightly before finally speaking.

"I highly doubt Robin would ever be dangerous to his friends Cyborg." It is Starfire who responds, her voice distant and slightly fearful.

"You have not seen Robin truly angry before Raven...you do not know what he is capable of." Raven's mouth sits agape, staring at Starfire. Of all people, she thought Starfire would be the one to be loudly and aggressively opposed to anything being said against Robin, but here she was doing her best to shoot down Raven's defense of him. Raven notices that Starfire is rubbing her arm now, the exact spot where she said Robin had grabbed her when he was yelling at her while under the influence of the dust. Raven couldn't help but wonder how much that action had affected the emotionally fragile girl.

"Alright, alright, no need to get out of order Raven, let's all calm down." Again Raven finds her mind reeling from shock at Cyborg's words. Her? Out of line?

"I am calm Cyborg." She did her best to suppress her frustration and continuing to grow confusion. Everyone and everything was just so surreal to her and in her mind, simply impossible. This was just not right to her. Why wasn't it obviously wrong to her friends. Cyborg gives her a slight glare before continuing speaking.

"Now why I called this meeting, is I need to know if you all think we can handle this apparent problem with Robin or do you think we need to go outside the tower to someone...more qualified."

"What do you mean friend Cyborg?" Starfire's question was innocent sounding enough though it somehow sent a chill down Raven's spine.

"What I mean Star, is should we turn Robin over to get some professional psychological help, help we may not be able to give him and that he may desperately need." Raven had known what Cyborg was talking but hearing it so blatantly clear caused her heart to clench along with her fists. Again Raven went on the defensive.

"Real friends wouldn't abandon someone so quickly in their time of need." Beast Boy firmly retorted.

"And real friends would know when they can no longer help anymore and go out and get that help." Again Raven was caught off guard. It felt to her like everyone was against her...against Robin and she couldn't shake these horrible feelings building inside of her.

"We don't have to make any decisions right now guys, I really just wanted to get all this out in the open because I really felt it needed to be discussed and to make sure everyone," Cyborg glances at Raven, "was aware of the situation. We can talk about more of this tomorrow but realize we need to come to a decision soon before...before something bad happens." Everyone, including Raven found herself grimly nodding with the assessment though Raven knew her nod was for different reasons.

"Now how about we go get some breakfast." Starfire and Beast Boy chirped up at this prospect and for the first time since they had been in there, Raven saw both of them smiling. She watched her three friends and teammates filter out the door, Beast Boy and Cyborg already fighting over what to make. All Raven could do was stand and stare at the three, amazed at how their moods had changed so quickly and suddenly to one of happiness after everything that had just been said and discussed. However, what bothered her the most was that she could tell from her empathic abilities that they truly were happy at this moment, and that fact disturbed her beyond description though not as much as the fact that Cyborg was acting as if their conversation last night had never happened.


	4. Chapter 4

1A/N: So for the record, for this story none of the episodes happened after haunted. I don't think I'm completely happy with this chapter but who knows. Another strange one but they've all been strange. Robin will be back in the next chapter when things probably will get stranger. Oh and thanks to everyone who reviewed. Every time I lose my interest in writing, I just go back and read a few nice reviews and it usually gets me going again so thank you very much. It is appreciated.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans, but hey, I think we all knew that already

Doors That Can't Be Closed

Chapter 4

By: FinalityLife

Raven hung back in the main room, seemingly in shadows, the same shadows that seemed to follow the young woman wherever she went, watching...observing her friends as they scampered around the kitchen preparing a very late breakfast as it was already after 10 o'clock. Each member was their characteristic jovial, boisterous self which in Raven's mind made absolutely no sense but of course there were plenty of things at the moment that didn't make any sense. Though Raven made no effort to hide her watching, as it was clearly visible to anyone just by looking at her, none of the Titans seemed to pay her any notice at all. The only time she would break her gaze from being on them was the few times she found herself looking at the main room entrance, hoping that Robin would just glide in with a smile on his face and make everything all right. He never did come.

Time passed with much of the same activities and feelings radiating off of her three teammates. They were not feeling concerned or worried, but had a strange contentment within each of them. As Raven watched, she continued to analyze the meeting that had taken place in Cyborg's room. Starfire and Beast Boy had seemingly made a point to attack her and her words and seemed completely in to the idea of removing Robin from the position of leader as well as the tower. Beast Boy had seemed so cold, so uncaring in that meeting and she had never seen him in such a way, with the one exception of when they had battled Terra. Raven felt herself shudder at the thought of the blonde girl as it reminded her of how she had allowed herself to be fooled, to be hurt, and nearly destroyed along with the rest of her friends.

Raven watched Starfire who had a very large grin on her face as she consumed some strange food of hers that only she could digest, let alone enjoy and Raven carefully noticed that despite her smile and the good feelings coming from her, she continued to rub that exact same spot on her arm. It seemed almost like there was still pain there that she was trying to sooth away, but Raven knew there was no physical pain anymore though she also knew there was indeed pain within the young woman still. However, it confused Raven as to why she felt no emotional distress from Starfire at all.

Raven's eyes drifted over to the third Titan, the one she knew for a fact had openly and blatantly lied about her and her actions to the other Titans. It was what made the least sense to her. Why would he do it? There was no possible explanation in her mind because she knew the man as well as anybody could, and he was not one to do such a thing. She also remembered how he had glared at her at the meeting, as if she was being out of control when in fact she was being the only true rational one there. Over and over again the same thought ran through Raven's head. Nothing made sense.

Raven quietly waited for a moment to talk to Cyborg alone and as time passed, she once again found herself impatiently tapping her foot on the floor. It seemed to her that Cyborg was purposely taking his time to cook and eat and carry on completely irrelevant conversations with Beast Boy. After what seemed like an eternity, Cyborg finally sat up from the kitchen table and announced that he was going to go work on the T-car for awhile. As he walked out of the room, Raven was positive that he had turned his head to give her the strangest of smiles though she wasn't sure if she had just imagined the entire thing. She just wasn't sure anymore.

Cyborg busied himself underneath the hood of the T-car, wrench in hand, a happy tune whistling from his lips. He never even saw her coming.

"Cyborg..."

"What the..." BAM! Cyborg had shot up from the sudden appearance of Raven's voice, making solid contact with the hood with the human side of his head. Raven almost felt like cringing at the sound of the impact but she really wasn't in a sympathetic mood.

"Damn, damn, damn! Why do you have to always be sneaking up on people Raven! Can't you just stick to doing that to Beast Boy. I know you would enjoy that a lot more." Raven glared out from under her hood.

"I believe you said almost the exact thing last night to me Cyborg when we talked or are you still trying to pretend for whatever reason that did not happen." Cyborg's face immediately turned to one of immense confusion before falling into a very strange look, one that was usually reserved for when a person was put face to face with a crazy person.

"Umm Rae, are you sure your feeling alright because I have no idea what you are talking about. The only person I talked to last night was Starfire when she came to my room to talk about Robin and his...condition. I never saw you last night." Raven's response was low, more of an accusing hiss than anything, and Raven wasn't even sure where it had come from, only that it was out of her mouth before she could even think.

"Liar." Raven watched as Cyborg took a slight step back, his apprehension at this very moment quite clear.

"Just calm down Rae. I mean why would I lie about something like that. Your like the baby sister I never had, why would I even think about doing something so stupid for a second. I'm not getting anything out of it." Raven found herself unable to come up with a response, noticing the genuine sincerity in Cyborg's voice when he had called her baby sister. She would be lying to herself if she didn't admit hearing those words spoken like that did bring her comfort, a different comfort than when Robin was near, but still good.

"I'm sorry Cyborg but I know I talked to you last night. Is it possible your having a glitch in your system or something, maybe affecting your memory." Cyborg's lips formed into a grim line.

"Sure, it has to be the machine's fault, faulty wiring or something." Raven felt the slightest sense of loathing in Cyborg's voice, whether it was for her or himself at that moment she was not quite clear.

"That's not what I meant Victor...its just...there has to be an explanation unless you really are just lying straight face to me right now." Raven was trying to keep her accusing tone light but she just couldn't help it. Her confusion and frustration were getting the better of her. Cyborg's eye turned hard, his voice stern.

"I am not going to stand here Raven and keep being insulted by you. I will not continue to let you call me a liar when I am not one. You come into my garage, making outrageous claims, questioning my integrity and then my own brain, and you expect me to stand here and take it." Cyborg was almost yelling and Raven found herself speechless and was happy her hood covered most of her face. This felt like it had come out of nowhere, Cyborg twisting her intentions into something bad. She wasn't trying to insult him, she was just trying to find answers, and now...mad would be an understatement.

"I'm sorry, I wasn't trying to insult you. You're overreacting Cyborg."

"Just like you were overreacting at the meeting this morning." Raven gritted her teeth.

"I was not overreacting."

"Yeah and you just always scream out no during general conversation. You're acting strange Raven. Maybe I'm not the one lying here. Maybe there's something wrong with you."

"There is nothing wrong with me Cyborg. I am not the one who 'forgot' our conversation yesterday." Raven flinched slightly as an angry Cyborg slammed the hood of the T-car down making a loud bang.

"Listen Rae, I did not talk to you last night." Each word was spoken loudly and emphasized to make his point. "So just stop with this nonsense. You need to stop acting weird and pull it together because in case you forgot we have a problem with our 'leader' which is far more serious than your little phantom conversations. Okay?" Raven again found herself wide-eyed in shock at Cyborg's outburst.

"Don't think for a second I forgot about Robin." Cyborg chuckled slightly.

"Could have fooled me Rae. Sometimes I wonder if you even give a damn about any of us." Raven felt anger rise in her though she knew it was from her and not her demonic side.

"How dare you!" Cyborg didn't even blink as Raven moved forward a little bit shaking slightly from her sudden rage. Again Cyborg chuckled quietly, his eye holding within it something Raven could not identify.

"Not so nice to be accused of things is it Rae. Especially those that are more truth than lies." Raven felt her anger boiling at the sheer audacity of Cyborg but she also wondered where this all had come from, how long he had felt this way toward her. He had just referred to her as his baby sister and now...she could see resentment in his eye. However, at this moment, Raven's anger met its match in her logic as she forced herself to float out of the room before she said anything she would regret in one of her rare displays of open anger. Of course she also knew in the back of her mind that she was running from Cyborg, slightly afraid of what he might say to her if the conversation continued. As she fled the confrontation, she never noticed the satisfied grin on Cyborg's face.

Hours later Raven found herself in her room, only a few candles lighting the room. Her anger had still not completely subsided nor had her confusion and doubts, doubts about what had happened and doubts about herself. Her mind told her she had been in the complete right, had been only trying to find out why one of her best friends was lying about her and her actions and in the end, she felt like he really didn't even want to be her friend. Raven felt her heart clench at that thought still remembering the resentment Cyborg had on his face. It also reminded her of that look Robin had given her when she left his room last night though that one was far more chilling and saddening.

Raven couldn't help but doubt herself. Did her friends really not think she cared about them? She knew she was slightly reclusive and had a cold demeanor but they had to know they meant everything to her yet all of them, directly or indirectly, over the past day had accused her of not caring about them, with the exception of Robin.

"Robin..." His name came softly of her lips as she though about her leader, her friend, her...she stopped there. She knew that if he was around, none of this would be happening, none of her so called friends would be questioning her as they had done. She knew that if he was around, he would be there to defend her, to remind them that her demeanor was simply her and there was nothing wrong with it and that in her heart she cared about all of them. However all of this was only a grim reminder that Robin wasn't there, that he was locked away in his room suffering alone, and if she couldn't find a way to help him soon, she knew the other Titans would send him away to some asylum where she wouldn't be able to... She told herself firmly she would never allow that to happen. She was pulled from her thoughts when she sensed two people walking in opposite directions down the hallway. It was Beast Boy and Cyborg. Inevitably they met in the middle of the hallway which was almost right outside Raven's door.

"Hey Cy, what was all that yelling I heard earlier. It sounded like you and Raven were arguing. What did she do to piss you off?" Raven wasn't trying to listen to their conversation but it was hard not to hear it, especially when it was partially about her.

"Man that girl just weirds me out sometimes ya know. She was accusing me of all this stuff and insulting me and it all just came out of nowhere. I mean she doesn't come out of her room for weeks at a time and when she does, she pulls crap like that. I don't know."

"I thought I was the only one she treated like garbage but it looks like she's turning on you too."

"Yeah looks like it but seriously man, she was acting really strange, gave me the creeps." Beast Boy laughed.

"Doesn't she always. I mean is there any better word to describe Raven than creepy." Cyborg joined in with Beast Boy and the two young men were openly laughing.

"I don't know...maybe frigid bitch." The two started laughing harder at their little jokes, the noise echoing loudly down the hallway.

"I guess we'll deal with her after we figure out what to do with Robin. That's a far more important issue than Raven ever could be." Beast Boy nodded in approval.

"Yeah, something has to be done with him and I'm positive we can't help him anymore. We need to do something before we have a repeat of Terra." There was a deep sadness in Beast Boy's words as he spoke about his lost love though it only lasted an instant.

"Let's go play some video games B.B., relax a little bit." Beast Boy nodded with a small smile and the two left to their destination. The only one who remained was the eavesdropper of the conversation. Raven was sitting against her door on the floor, her cloak covering her entire body, her arms wrapped around herself underneath. Beast Boy and Cyborg's words continued to sit in her mind, continuing to mock her. It hurt, it hurt a lot.

"I'm not creepy..." She felt waves of incredible sadness and depression flowing through her body and every repeat of their words in her head only made it worse. That was how her so-called friends thought of her...such cruel and mean spirited words and all they did was laugh. She was nothing but a joke to them. When had all this started? How long had she diluted herself into believing she actually had friends, wasn't alone. It wasn't fair, it couldn't be true but she knew from the feelings both young men were giving off that they felt what they said. This couldn't be happening.

"Robin..." Again his name found its way out of her mouth, this time however it was said with almost a pleading cry. He would not come, he would not help her, he might even despise her just the same as the rest did but the possibility of him feeling that way hurt by far the most because it meant a lot of things that helped her get through every day were nothing but lies. Raven simply continued to stare off into nothingness, completely forgetting about the mysterious lost conversation with Cyborg and the meeting this morning, but rather could only wallow in self doubt and pity. She would remain there for hours, with not a single object so much as moving anywhere in the tower due to her powers even with the raging emotional storm within.


	5. Chapter 5

1A/N: Yeah...so...yeah. Thanks to everyone who reviewed the last chapter and I'm sure everyone will be happy because Robin is back and well...you'll see. This was a tough one to write and I'm not sure how I feel about it yet so ya know...usual pessimistic self evaluation and all. Anyways, enjoy this chapter as much as possible and hopefully I'll have another one up soon.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans, but hey, I think we all knew that already

Doors That Can't Be Closed

Chapter 5

By: Finalitylife

Maybe she should just leave. Maybe she should just pull herself off the floor and go away forever, never to return. It was clear she had no friend's hear, no one wanted her here, so why did she stay? She had been just fine when she had been completely alone, never talking with anyone, never interacting with another living being. Of course she knew she hadn't been okay. She had been lonely, terribly lonely and when she formed the Titans with Robin, she thought that maybe that loneliness would go away and it had for awhile. However, at this moment, she felt more alone than ever before.

She never had any friends...only teammates who needed her power, who mocked her behind her back, who eyed her with resentment. It wasn't supposed to be this way but it was...and it tore Raven up on the inside.

Raven still couldn't make herself move from the spot she sat leaning against her door, her dead eyes staring out into nothingness as these same thoughts...their words continued to beat against her mind. Creepy...frigid...bitch...those who cared about her would never say such things ever yet they had all too clearly. Why did she stay?

In the back of her mind though, Raven did know the answer to that one very important question she kept asking herself. Why did she stay? It was because of Robin. She would not selfishly abandon him in his time of need. She would not leave his fragile state in the hands of the others who would surely lock him away with strangers where she knew no one would be able to truly help him. It was the very least she could do for the great man who led the Titans, who on more than one occasion had saved her life, and providing feelings of safety and comfort that she had almost never felt before in her lonely life.

She tried to think of some of her special memories to try and bring the slightest bit of contentment to her mind, not being greedy enough to look for something that reminded her of being happy rather only contentment, as she continued to fight her war within just as another war was being fought right down the hall.

Robin P.O.V:

"Shut up."

"Do you know what they are doing?"

"Die."

"I think you know what they're doing right at this moment."

"Shut up."

"It is so very obvious because you know they don't care."

"Die."

"They are planning on locking you away."

"Shut up."

"And once you are alone...you will be mine forever."

"Shut up!" My fist crunches loudly against my solid metal wall though Slade avoids it easily. I do not feel the pain that I know is coursing through my hand and my arm nor do I feel the pain from the numerous lacerations that cover my body, blood steadily dripping to the floor. I glare menacingly at Slade, my strength fueled by my unending anger. I am more man than beast at this moment but I do not care because it allows me to ignore the pain, the weariness of my body as I continue to fight against the one who will not leave me in peace, who whispers secrets and truths to me that I do not wish to hear though can not deny.

It used to be just Slade coming to hurt me and then his relentless voice echoing within every corner of my mind but now...he in every aspect refused to leave and the hours that I have fought him continue to tick by. He only taunts, rarely attacks to inflict the growing numbers of wounds on my tired body, though I never stop trying to end him.

"I can tell you without a shadow of a doubt that they want you gone Robin. They meet secretly behind your back, planning and plotting. They are all against you Robin...especially Raven."

"Die!" Again I attack, sending a kick at Slade that would have surely cracked his neck like a twig but again I miss, my foot meeting the wall again, sending a shockwave through my entire body. It is just another tremor through my body which continued to be ravaged by them.

I continue to curse the other Titan's existence as they do not arrive to help. They have to know I am fighting this battle. The sound of it had to be clear into the hallways but they do not show up. Slade keeps me far away from the door to exit my room, my communicator smashed long ago, and I know that even if the Titans had given a damn, they were outside my reach.

"They have no faith in you Robin...she has no faith in you. They know you have already fallen Robin and thusly, your time here has come to an end.

"Shut up damn it. Just shut up!" I can feel my body shaking uncontrollably with what flows through me, my fists clenched in relentless fury. His words infuriate me and stab at my very being over and over again. The Titans are no longer there for me, they were never there for me.

"All your paranoia, all your mistrust have all been warranted because in the end, you have always been right. They all are truly against you Robin...and if they have it Raven's way...they shall end you." Nothing but lies, nothing but fallacy. I knew it, knew it all along but I refused to trust my instincts. They never cared. There smiles always empty, there embraces hallow, their words hiding the twisted truth. And Raven, Raven was the worst because I actually trusted her and she rewarded me by leading the witch hunt against me. A dark, distorted laugh erupts from my very being as the smallest bit of calm exists within me.

"I shall prove to them all that they should have never doubted me. I shall prove to them all that I am not to be betrayed, not to be turned against. They shall pay. However, I shall first prove to them that I am not crazy, that you are truly real...by delivering your severed head to them as proof of their failures and ignorance." An enraged battle cry emanated from me, and I advance quickly on my blood-lusts target.

Back in Raven's room, she continued to dwell on what had all happened.

"Maybe I should take a trip to Nevermore...maybe that will help clear my head, give me a better perspective on what I should do." Raven finally rose to her feet, finally deciding to visit her mindscape for some clarity but as she neared the mirror that acted as the portal, her communicator began buzzing relentlessly. When she opened it up, she was greeted with the face of Cyborg, who clearly looked angry.

"Damn it Raven...are you deaf and blind! Do you not hear the alarm going off or the red lights flashing everywhere. There's an attack going down!" Raven found herself blinking in shock.

"There was no alar..." She was abruptly cut off by Cyborg.

"I really don't care what your excuse is Raven but we need to get going. Go drag Robin's scrawny ass out of his room and meet the rest of us downtown."

"We should not bring Robin...we should leave..." Again Cyborg cut her off with a loud bellow.

"Just shut up and do what I say Raven! Your wasting time with your idiotic words and people could be getting hurt. Now go get Robin and for once, do what a Titan is supposed to do and act like a hero." Cyborg's face disappeared from the screen and the communicator turned off. All Raven could do was continue to stare at where his face had been, the biting tone of his words still ripping into her and it took every ounce of her will not to throw the communicator at the wall.

Maybe Cyborg was right and she was acting selfish by refusing orders in the cities time of need. Of course there were many maybes running through her head at this moment but eventually she found herself floating quickly down the hallway toward Robin's room. Just as she was about to call out his name, an explosion erupted from with the room, blowing the door straight out at Raven. It was more by instinct than anything else that allowed her to put up a black shield of energy to stop the door from crushing her to death though it still pushed her back, the force still causing her to slam against the wall. She fell to one knee, wincing slightly from pain though she was quickly to her feet as she noticed the dark figure in the former doorway, slightly obscured by the drifting smoke.

"Robin..." He did not respond as she thought he would.

"I am going to kill you Slade and then I am going to make sure the rest know I am not to be messed with." The sheer anger and hatred in Robin's voice made her shiver but her blood truly turned cold as Robin suddenly shot forward at her and again, by instinct her power sprang to life and grabbed hold of the young man in front of her and pushed him back against a nearby wall, her doing the best to hold him there. She in no way sensed Slade anywhere or for that matter anyone else in the near vicinity, only more proof that Robin was totally delusional, his mind gone.

Raven hadn't been able to completely catch him in her energy and the birdarang that had been in his hand was thrown forward, slicing across her shoulder. She let out a yelp, losing her grip on Robin as she felt the blood begin to flow from her shoulder. Again he charged forward with a scream and with fear in her eyes, she let lose more energy at him, encasing him completely with her power, again slamming him against the wall. This time he held. His entire body below his neck was outlined in her dark energy and she was surprised when he continued to struggle, continued to make progress in breaking the hold.

It simply did not make sense. As strong as Robin was physically, his physical strength could never match up against the power of Raven's mind and magic yet at this moment, Robin was slowly winning the battle. He snarled like some kind of crazed beast at her, trying to free himself.

"I won't let you win Slade. I won't let you do this to me. I will kill you, I swear it!" Raven felt her heart breaking at the sight in front of her as Robin continued to try his best to lash out at her, madness and rage clearly having a complete grip over him.

"Robin please...please stop this. Its me Raven, not Slade. There's no one here to hurt you." Robin seemed to stop for the briefest of moments and Raven could feel the boiling rage within him silence. He seemed to stop struggling as his eyes focused on the purple-haired young woman in front of him and instead of the burning anger, she felt a coldness sweep out from him that permeated her entire body.

"Raven...you are to blame for this...I trusted you and then this. I hate y..." Before he could finish his dark statement, a stream of blue energy slammed into his head and upon impact, slammed his head back into the wall with a loud impact. Robin immediately stopped struggling and his head fell over, hanging loosely as he continued to hang there from Raven's power. It took Raven a few seconds to figure out what had just happened when she finally regained herself and immediately flew forward catching Robin's now unconscious body as her power relinquished. She immediately saw the many bleeding wounds on his body, wounds he could have only done to himself and again she felt her heart bleed at the condition of the young man in front of her though his frigid words battered her will to help him.

Her eyes slowly moved down the hallway to find Cyborg with his sonic cannon still trained on Robin, Starfire with glowing starbolts in each of her hands, and Beast Boy in a battle ready stance.

"What do you think your doing?" Raven's voice came out weak sounding and she immediately hated herself for sounding like that in this position.

"I did what needed to be done. He need to be stopped."

"You could have killed him with that blast." Raven's voice was stern this time, repressing her anger within, repressing everything within.

"No I couldn't have. I turned down the amplitude of the blast so it wouldn't be fatal." Raven only grimaced at the response.

"Why are you here so quickly? I thought you left to the city for the emergency." Cyborg's face never once wavered.

"What are you talking about Raven. There was no emergency, there was no alarm."

"But I just talked to you over the communicator...you told me to get Robin to deal with the emergency in the city..."

"Not this again Raven. Why do you keep making up things? There was no emergency, I did not talk to you, and for the record I would have never told you to go get Robin in the condition he is in. What kind of leader would I be if I told you to go near this deranged psychopath. Raven's eyes narrowed as she looked at Cyborg.

"You're not the leader Cyborg." He matched her glare with his one eye.

"Some one has to be when the old leader is no longer capable of anything." Starfire and Beast Boy did not say anything, only staring at Raven and the fallen Robin. Raven got the impression that Beast Boy was looking at both of them with disdain while Starfire's eyes only seemed to be focused on her as she held Robin in her arms. It was a very unsettling gaze.

"Well it doesn't matter right now because this only proves that Robin is dangerous and can't be allowed to stay here. We need to get him out of here so that he can get some help. We should put him in a holding cell until we find someone..." Raven pleaded with Cyborg's cold, uncaring tone.

"We can't just lock him up. He's injured. He needs medical attention now." Cyborg looked on casually at Raven.

"Alright. We'll take him to the infirmary and this time, we will ensure that he can't get out of the bed we restrain him too. Raven, you can carry him because right now, I really don't want to touch him." Cyborg turned and walked away and Beast Boy and Starfire only followed, though giving one last glances back as they left. Raven only could stare silently as they all left, the only sound remaining was the occasional drip of Robin's blood hitting the ground.


	6. Chapter 6

1A/N: Would someone please tell me what the heck is going on? Oh wait, I'm supposed to know that...Uh Oh...umm...parasitic three-toed sloths with a grudge against those with opposable thumbs? And I think we have a problem...well more than usual.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans, but hey, I think we all knew that already

Doors That Can't Be Closed

Chapter 6

By: Finalitylife

Raven was the only one in the infirmary with Robin, using her healing powers to close the bloody, jagged wounds that covered his body. The wounds were not smooth cuts but rather savage tears in his body, many of them deep. It truly amazed Raven how Robin had simply not succumb to blood loss and it was truly amazing that he had been able to attack as he did. The image of Robin's snarling face flashed through Raven's mind as she quivered just the slightest.

All the images of Robin she had lately were not ones she wanted. Why couldn't she be seeing his smiling face. Even his cocky smirk would have been welcomed at this moment but instead there was nothing on his unconscious face.

Robin was restrained heavily to the bed. His belt, boots, cape and shirt had been removed to ensure that he did not have anything hiding on him that could allow his escape. He would not be allowed to escape this time as he had done once before. Raven carefully worked on his healing and couldn't help but notice many other scars all over his body, the lasting proof of a human's quest to be a superhero. She also couldn't help but notice how built Robin's slender frame actually was and she occasionally found her eyes lingering too long on his physique rather than paying attention to her work.

It took some time but eventually Robin's body was fully healed though she knew that wasn't the real problem and as powerful as her powers were, she could not fix his mind. She knew it would be futile to try and enter his mind again to try and help because she knew he would never allow her entrance and his mental discipline and will were far beyond almost anything she had encountered before. If he wanted, she wouldn't even be able to pick the slightest emotions up with her empathy.

Raven let out a deep sigh, a twinge of weariness slipping into her after all the energy she used, after all she had been through recently, after all the emotional trauma she had endured. She was tired...just tired of everything that was going on. She gently traced her hand across Robin's cheek and felt a surge of wrongness flow through her, though she was unable to pinpoint what it had exactly been. Cyborg took this moment to enter into the infirmary, pulling her away from her attempt to ponder.

"Are you done in here yet Raven?" Cyborg's voice held almost no emotion except annoyance. Raven didn't even want to look up at him.

"He is healed but I am not done in here. I want to wait until he wakes up so I can talk to him. I want to try and get through to him." Cyborg let out an unbelieving grunt.

"I highly doubt you'll get anything out of him but threats and nonsensical accusations. Face it Raven, he's completely gone." Raven finally looked up, a challenging glare in her eyes.

"What is wrong with you Cyborg. What is wrong with everybody. None of you should be acting so...so cold, like you don't care about him." Cyborg smiled the smallest of smiles.

"You mean acting like you right." Raven clenched her teeth.

"That is not what I am talking about Cyborg. I am talking about how no one seems like they want to help Robin."

"We all are trying to help Robin. It is just simply that the rest of us know that it is not us who can help him. You just can't seem to realize that fact and its only causing more problems than we need. It doesn't help that you keep making up these stories..."

"I did not make anything up. Everything I have said is the truth."

"Well maybe your truth but it is not the real truth." Raven did her best to restrain her desire to magically throw something at the metal man.

"So what do YOU plan on doing with Robin if you seem to know exactly what needs to be done."

"Well after discussing it with the more rational members of the team, we've decided to send him back to Gotham City, to Arkham Asylum."

"Are you insane!" Cyborg seemed to take a step back as Raven stood up, her feelings having far surpassed being upset. "Do you have any idea what you just said? Can you even comprehend what type of people are there. Robin helped put half of them in there. He'll be killed the second he gets there."

"I think your overreacting Raven."

"I think your under reacting Cyborg. You can not do this. You can not keep acting like Robin is some deranged criminal that needs to be locked away with other psychopaths. He needs help...he needs our help." Cyborg's face remained impassive the entire time.

"You just don't understand Raven but what do I really expect from someone like you. Anyways, the decision has already been made..."

"You made a final decision without even asking me?"

"Raven, almost every decision around this place is made without even asking you because your never around and almost all the time you don't even care. So just accept what is going to happen...or don't but I highly suggest you do." Cyborg made his final point with a heartless glare and Raven found her eyes widen as Cyborg more or less threatened her. It was a terrible shock and a painful occurrence for Raven...that Cyborg would go this far. However, nothing could truly measure up to what he would say next.

"And once Robin is gone, it probably would be best if you disappeared too. I don't think you'll be wanted or needed here anymore. You've long out stayed your welcome." Raven couldn't find the words or the will to respond as Cyborg gave her one last dismissive glare before he walked out of the room, again leaving only Robin and Raven together.

"This can't be happening...none of this can be happening." She turned toward Robin who had yet to move. "Damn it Robin...you need to wake up. You need to pull yourself together or...or everything is going to fall apart. Do you hear me Robin...I need you... I need you to help me." Raven was in borderline hysteria, finding herself incapable of dealing with the crushing weight of all of this. She watched as Robin's body started to shift and she could help but feel a small bit of hope well up inside of her.

"Robin..." He started slowly moving his arms and legs, only able to do the slightest bit of movement due to the restraints. His movements soon became more aggressive, more desperate as he tried to free himself, his words panicky.

"Have to get free before he comes back...have to get away...damn it let me go!"

"Robin please calm down. Slade is not here. Its all in your head. You have to realize it." As if he finally realized she was there, Robin's gaze snapped over at the small girl standing next to the bed, his next word filled with contempt.

"You! I don't want to hear your damn lies...this is all your doing I know it. Your handing me over right to him you bitch." He continued to struggle against his bonds as Raven visibly flinched at each hate-filled word.

"Robin...you know I would never betray you. You're my best friend...and I've realized...maybe the only friend I actually had." Robin only laughed, a twisted, disturbed chuckle.

"Lies...all lies...I should have never trusted you...never trusted a half-demon bitch." Raven felt her heart, her mind, as well as her entire body freeze up at Robin's words. She couldn't even manage to get out a disbelieving 'How' though what she wanted to say was clearly evident to Robin.

"Don't think I didn't know Raven. Do you really think I would have started this team with you without doing a little research on you first, contacted a few sources. Did you think I was stupid?" Raven still couldn't form a coherent word, couldn't even manage to blink, her eyes as wide open as possible.

"But I allowed my self to be suckered in by your innocent act...tricked...deceived. Why did I ever trust you!"

"Please..." Raven barely managed that, a begging plea to the bound man in front of her who despite his situation, held far more power over her than she did him.

"Slade has done me one favor in this lifetime and that was allowing me to realize the truth you treacherous bitch. I promise Raven, that when I get free, you will pay for all of this. You will pay for betraying my trust." Again Raven felt that unnatural wrongness radiating off of Robin. However, it quickly faded as he again started thrashing around like a madman trying to free himself, inhuman growls mixing with savage grunts as he vainly tried to get away. He only served to cause the restraints to begin to dig into his flesh and Raven began to see spots of blood forming on his body. Raven instinctively approached to help him but he only screamed at her to get away from him. He finally started screaming Slade's name, screaming for Slade to leave him alone, his eyes locked on a spot where there was nothing there.

Eventually, Raven couldn't take it anymore and with tears beginning to form in her eyes, she disappeared into the shadows, knowing that the life she had thought she had created here had cruelly been taken away.

Raven again found herself in her room though she could not find any comfort there. Everything in her room seemed to be mocking her, laughing at her, taunting her with the words of the other Titans. Raven desperately clutched her ears, trying to block out all the voices.

"I can't take this. This all can't be real...this all has to be some horrible dream, just my worst nightmare coming true. Any moment I'll wake up and everything will be okay. Robin will be fine and the rest will still be me friends and I won't be alone. Any moment now I'll wake up...any moment now...wake up...wake up Raven! Why won't I wake up!" Raven grabbed a small statue and threw it at the wall, shattering it into a million pieces, a pointless act by a lost little girl. Tears were now falling from her eyes and she wanted to just throw herself out the window, her room continuing to laugh at her. She pitifully fell to her knees, again clutching her hands to her ears as the cruel taunts and angry words continued to drive the knife deeper and deeper into her already torn and bleeding heart.

"Why do I keep going...there is nothing left for me here...nothing left for me anywhere...I have no reason left..." And just like that, everything made sense. Raven dutifully stood up, her purpose all the now more clear than ever before. Her final task to stop all the loneliness and suffering. With a wave of her hand, the wall facing the outside in her room exploded out, allowing her the path to the ground below, her road to oblivion. As she took her small steps forward images of their cold eyes, their resentment all too clear flashed through her mind, Robin's maddened and hate-filled words echoing within her soul yet her end was not to be. As she stared out, ready to fall, the magic mirror...the portal to her mind reacted to the situation, and a talon of black energy rushed out, grasping tightly on to the broken young woman, and without a sound, pulled her into her own mind.

Her room grew deadly quiet except for the sound of the gentlest of breezes blowing through the destroyed wall...and not a single Titan cared to come question the noise from the explosion though a piercing bellow of rage could not be ignored.


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: The beginning of some answers...the beginning of ends...the beginning of things that won't end well or make sense, and I'm sure more surprises...and a touch of insanity. And away we go...

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans, but hey, I think we all knew that already

Doors That Can't Be Closed

Chapter 7

By: Finalitylife

"Stupid Robin. Stupid Raven. Its all their fault that Terra is gone. They never trusted her. They were always so hard on her and because of them, she went to Slade and...and I lost her forever. I hate both of you so much."

"Why did Robin lash out at me...why did Robin hurt me? Why won't he just let me love him as I desire? It is Raven's fault...I see her trying to steal away my boy...I see her trying to take away what is mine. It is her fault Robin is sick...she was jealous of what I had...she affected his mind and now I've lost him. I hate her."

"Stupid spiky-haired jerk, always acting like he is better than me, like he's the only one capable of leading. Well ya know what, now I'm the leader and he's the nothing. Serves him right. And Raven...uncaring, selfish bitch...just like Robin, always treating me like I'm nothing, like I'm just some damn machine. I hope she just disappears too. They both will get what they deserve."

"Why did I let myself be drawn in to their lies...why was I so stupid...and Raven...she is the worst of them all. I actually trusted her, actually let her in...her betrayal hurts the most because I allowed myself to believe it wouldn't come...I hate you Raven."

Was she in Hell? Was she finally where she was born to be? She could hear the cold, cruel thoughts of each of the Titans echoing around her, each one harder to hear than the next yet it was more than just hearing them...she was feeling them too, she was feeling the pain, the resentment...the hate and it was unbearable.

She did not remember falling from the window nor hitting the ground and Raven found herself at a complete loss as to what was going on . She knew she was on the ground, her body quivering from the bombardment of cruel emotion that continued to slam into her over and over again. Why hadn't it stopped? Why wasn't she dead like she had wanted?

She pulled her shaking body off the hard, rocky ground and took in the sight around her. Dead, barren, dark, and strange...the landscape of her mind. How had she come to this place? How was it that she could hear her friend's from inside her own mind? Only more unanswered questions for the lost soul.

It always felt strange to be within her mind because it was a place that she did not hold absolute power over despite it being her own self. Here, her other aspects were capable of their own individual thoughts and actions that ultimately made up her total self, the one that she truly was, the one who at this moment was barely holding anything together.

However, this time, this unexpected trip to her mind felt different than any others before because she found herself having difficulty connecting to Nevermore, felt a strange hollowness to everything around her, and could not simply make sense out of these strange feelings similar to the ones she had felt from Robin when he had attacked her and back in the infirmary.

Her mind continued to be battered by the sounds of the other Titan's thoughts and Robin's were clearly becoming more angry, more deranged. Doing her best to block it all out, Raven again surveyed her own mind, realizing that not a single emotion had come to greet her. At the very least Intelligence would should up because she was the one Raven most frequently talked to but even the thick glasses wearing Raven in the yellow cloak was nowhere to be found, nothing was to be found, not even the occasional squawk of a four-eyed raven, and that fact made Raven very nervous for they were always present no matter what.

Raven started walking forward, her destination the vast library of Intelligence, where maybe she would find answers. The voices had become quiet murmurs, settling at the edge of her hearing, the words not clear though the feelings still strong.

As she walked, the distorted aspects of her mind only seemed to increase and the eerie silence of it all made no sense because she knew what an emotional wreck she was right now. It was taking every ounce of her will to not simply fall over and curl up in a ball and simply wallow in sadness, pain, and self loathing. Thankfully, the path was short as Raven knew all the short cuts of her own mind and she found herself at the steps to Intelligence's domain.

The place always had the smell of musty old books which in fact was the only thing at this moment that made sense to Raven because it was in fact a huge library of thousands of books...her thoughts, her memories, all that she had learned over her lifetime so far. Enormously tall shelves filled with thick books, organized perfectly and then there was the complete opposite: giant, chaotic piles of books that spilled out into the walkways between the shelves, no recognizable order whatsoever. This was the most central point of Raven's mind, where almost every action was processed by the most logical part of herself, the true problem solving part of herself, where she hoped to find answers.

"Intelligence!" Raven's voice immediately started echoing around the area, bouncing off the walls, carrying itself down the seemingly endless aisles. There was no response except for the constant, low murmurings of the other Titan's dark thoughts. Everything felt extremely creepy to Raven though she did her best not to think of that particular word. It only brought more pain.

"Where are you?" Her words traveled the same path and received the same response...nothing.

"Why won't you answer me?" These words came out as a defeated plea, barely above a whisper but it was these words that were finally answered.

"Because...she can't." The voice was even quieter than Raven's had been just a second ago, terribly meek and scared sounding, and Raven knew exactly who it was.

"Timid..." Raven turned around and felt, like for the millionth time this day, her heart stop dead in her chest. For standing in front of her was not the painfully meek form of Timid, but something far frailer, and far more pathetic looking. Raven could barely recognize this 'person' as a mirror image of herself. There was the obvious fact this Raven was clad in various shades of grey, the differences went far deeper than that. This Raven looked like some type of living skeleton, her bones pushing out, blatantly visible, her eyes sunken, her hair dead and scraggily. Her whole body looked like it was ready to fall over, ready to die at any second, though the real Raven realized she had been ready to die as well not that long ago.

"Timid..." This time Raven's voice was a mixture of pity and worry as she stared upon this withering being.

"I...I am far more now than only that emotion. All your fear, all your pain, all your suffering, sadness, and fear have become me and I have become them. It hurts...it hurts so very much all the time...yet...yet I still saved you from taking your own life." Raven could not believe what this...this dying wraith was telling her.

"You! How could you save me! You barely can stand there and your telling me I'm alive because of you!" Raven did not mean to snap at her but was simply just too on edge, just too completely bewildered by this. The grey-cloaked Raven immediately shrunk back from the yell, head hidden within the folds of the cloak, but the dry, tentative voice still spoke.

"Though your pain is causing me incredible suffering, it...it is giving me enough strength to fight against what I fear above all else...death. I am...I am so very terrified of dying." Tears were evident in the girl's sunken eyes, her fear felt deep within Raven's soul and she knew the words and feelings were true. Self preservation, fear of dying; they were powerful forces even when she had lost everything else.

"You said Intelligence couldn't answer me..why is that, where is she?" The picture of frailty in front of her met her questioning gaze with one born of a grim, unrelenting danger.

"The one has ensured none of them can answer you. I am only left because she knew everything she would do would only cause me great pain and she found savage joy in my suffering. She said I was too weak to even matter and left me to wallow in the suffering that she hoped would eat away at me as slowly as possible."

"No...please no...this can't be..." The grey-cloaked Raven nodded only slightly.

"It is. She escaped when you let down your barriers to save the one known as Robin. She escaped when you divided your strength to ensure the one Happiness always speaks of lived. She is free...and now...she seeks to ensure her freedom never is taken away again." Raven felt an extreme wave of nausea hit her and she dropped on to all fours as the meager contents of her stomach were expelled into her mindscape. Had she been able to think clearly at all, she would have questioned how such an act was even possible in this place but right now that was the very least of her worries for the darkest part of her soul had gained her freedom, escaped from her cage in the darkest depths of her mind.

"How could I have not none, how could I have not felt it, put all the pieces together...how could I have been so blind?"

"She bound the other aspects of your personality and without them, you could not see what should have been clear to you...could not see the dangerous truth as it closed in around you. All you could see is the pain inflicted upon you, over and over again, all you could feel is what I represent, that which destroyed you."

"We have to find her now! We have to imprison her once again before its too late. Do you hear me?" Raven was now shaking her counterpart as she gripped her boney shoulders tightly, panic overwhelming, her voice of reason nowhere to be found even in her own domain.

"You are correct...but...but..."

"But what...please tell me..."

"She no longer resides fully in your mind. The majority of her presence has found sanctuary in another through the bond you created...in another who was not strong enough at the time to resist, who was not well enough to see through her manipulation...her lies."

"You don't mean...please not him..." Raven pleaded though she already knew the horrible truth.

"Yes...the one who means the most to us...he is now the slave to our darkness, the holder of that which seeks to consume. He is lost...they are all lost...because of us and our failures." A scream of the deepest anguish ripped through the entire existence of Nevermore, penetrating even into the deep recesses where things were meant to be forgotten. Within this dark place, blood-eyed raven's with glistening fangs almost in the form of a twisted smile sat perched on the shoulders of what appeared to be scarecrows. Unmoving, their arms stretched out to the sides as if held up to an invisible cross by red energy, each one dressed in a different colored cloak, each one with a single tear rolling down their defeated faces as the unescapable truth was finally made known.


	8. Chapter 8

1A/N: Ya know, I am rather curious as to what everyone thought was going to happen because it seems like everyone who reviewed said they were way off. I guess I accomplished my goal...let's see what else I can come up with...more than likely messed up. Enjoy...I guess.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans, but hey, I think we all knew that already

Doors That Can't Be Closed

Chapter 8

By: Finalitylife

"All my fault all my fault ALL MY FAULT!" Raven's screams continued to echo across her mindscape, her despair and anguish ravaging what was left of her fragile sanity. Her emaciated doppleganger could only helplessly look on, each scream physically hurting the already deeply suffering emotional representation yet Raven did not seem to care.

"Everything...their torment...the horrible thoughts...and Robin...his sanity was torn apart by me because I wasn't strong enough, because I was weak and useless. I just want to die...I just want to fade away. I don't want to be here anymore!" Raven collapsed to the ground, a huddled mess of her former self, only a shell of her former self thanks to her dark side's meddling. Finally, her other self managed to speak despite her incredible pain.

"Would you...would you be so selfish as to leave them caught in the web of her making, would you be so uncaring as to leave Robin with that...that thing dwelling inside him. If you allow that to happen, then you truly are as pathetic as you see me as." Raven jumped to her feet and with a snarl tackled the weaker version of herself to the ground, her hands instantly locking around her throat.

"Who are you to judge me? You are only worthless emotions that I despise. You are nothing. You hear me! Nothing!" The grey cloaked Raven did not resist, did not fight back, only stared up at the real Raven with empty, dead eyes. The real Raven continued to squeeze, seeing nothing but red as her anger was unleashed, wanting nothing more than to choke the life out of her weakness.

However, in an instant, just enough of her mind snapped back into place and her vision became clear again, her grip loosening. She looked down at the grey-cloaked Raven who still had not moved, completely resigned to her punishment.

"Oh...what have I done...what have I become..." Raven fell off the other version, collapsing again to the ground, arms wrapped around herself. Tears again started pouring from her eyes, helplessness once again reigning supreme. The other Raven remained laying on her back, deep bruises now imprinted in her thin neck.

"Your darker emotions are still free within you just as the emotions I represent. They are still there for you to feel, to wield."

"Why does that even matter...nothing you can say can matter..."

"If you are willing to accept your weaker feelings as well as your darker feelings as part of yourself, accept them rather than deny them, then you can gain strength back. You can become strong enough to free the rest of your mind from her demented imprisonment, can retake your entire being from her control. And maybe...maybe then you can save the Titans from her...save Robin."

Raven did not respond immediately, only continued to lie there. Eventually, her body showed signs of life as she lifted herself from the ground, slowly as if all her limbs weighed hundreds of pounds. She looked down at her other self, who still had not moved, resembling a corpse in its coffin at a funeral rather than an actual sentient being. Raven reached out her hand to the grey cloaked Raven.

"Come on then...let's go. At least we can try...for them." The grey-cloaked Raven tentatively accepted the hand and Raven easily pulled the almost nonexistent weight to her feet. The two turned and walked off, their destination the darkest corner of Raven's mind, where only horror dwelled.

Robin continued to thrash around on his bed, eyes locked open in horror at Slade who stood only a few feet away. He seemed even more imposing than ever before, even more frightening. His cold grey eye no longer stared at him but instead burned crimson, his hands now seemed to be sharp claws more than his normal deadly hands, and his voice...it now sounded like a distorted version of Raven's rather than Slade's smooth, taunting voice.

"The time has come Robin." Robin screamed as a claw slashed across his chest, opening five, jagged lines in his body. "No one cares...no one gives a damn. You are nothing...except mine." Robin's scream echoed threw every wall of the tower. Starfire cringed, Beast Boy showed nothing, and Cyborg...he muttered the word psycho under his breath.

Raven as she walked felt the extreme pain that ripped through Robin thanks to the bond they shared...the bond that had ultimately doomed them all. She knew...she somehow knew that Robin had finally lost the battle for himself. She fought back the tears and instead allowed her anger to flow threw her, empowering her a little more, and she increased her pace toward her goal.

The surroundings were without any light yet somehow things remained visible against the unending black backdrop. The two Raven's, one real, one a representation of her weaker emotions, stood on the threshold of where Raven wished to never venture. It was the domain of all that was dark within Raven...her hatred, her anger, her jealousy, many more that she always wished she could deny because they only reminded her of what she truly was...a demonspawn. This was supposed to be a prison, a cage for one being to be locked away in yet because of her weakness, because of her inability to control her own self, freedom was granted to the one who should never had it.

Raven took a tentative step forward with the grey cloaked Raven standing behind her, following slowly. In the blackness, Raven could hear the occasional flap of some wings, rustling of feathers, a high pitched squawk, or the disturbing grinding of teeth. As they took a few more steps, the object of their quest could be seen ahead, all the other representations of Raven's personality lined up in their capture, unable to fight against their restraints.

"We need to free them...they must be set free..." Raven was about to take another step forward when a boney, icy hand was placed on her shoulder to stop her.

"No...let me go first..." Raven gave a questioning look that really couldn't be clearly seen but it didn't even seem like her other self was paying attention to her. The corpse like Raven shuffled slowly past her and after getting a few feet in front of her, Raven knew why she had gone first.

Hundreds of red-eyed, deformed ravens suddenly converged on the helpless form of the grey cloaked Raven. She screamed unearthly screams as they began pecking and gnawing at what little flesh was on her bones. Raven could only stare on in horror at the sight but the other Raven screamed for her to hurry. Raven sped past as fast as she could, swatting a few scattered ravens away from her but as she neared the prisoners she slammed into a barrier of red energy. She fell back to the ground, her entire body burning all over.

"No...this can't be...so close..." She turned around as the grey-cloaked Raven let out another bloody scream. Raven was shocked to find the other Raven still on her feet, refusing to succumb to the attacks, doing her best to give Raven time. Her body and face was a mess of missing chucks of flesh, her eyes were clearly no longer there, pecked out, and her cloak was soaked in her dull colored blood, yet she still would not go down. Raven found herself growling.

"So much pain...so much suffering...all to help me...all because of me...she did not deserve it...she does NOT deserve this!" In an instant, Raven's eyes turned fiery red though only two formed, her strength increasing incredibly. Raven was pissed beyond words, her accepted darker side fueling her. The raven's seemed to stop their assault, their beady red eyes locking on Raven's red eyes. They left their heavily wounded prey who finally collapsed to the ground, making a soggy sounding squish as she hit the ground. The raven's flew over and landed at the feet of Raven and lowered their heads, doing their best to bow to their master.

"Begone." The raven's nodded their heads and flew off into the darkness, far, far away into the depths of Raven's mind. Raven walked confidently toward her other forms, passing threw the barrier that once repelled her with ease. They all looked up at her, disbelief on all of their faces. Raven's hand glowed black with power and with a simple wave of it, the red energy that bound each of her other forms dissipated, freeing each of them. They all looked upon Raven as her eyes continued to glow red, unsure of what to do, not sure if she really was on their side. Brave leaned toward Intelligence and whispered in her ear, the slightest bit of fear in the voice of Raven's courage.

"Did she finally succumb to her dark side?" Intelligence shook her head.

"No. I believe she has accepted that aspect of her in order to free us. We think that we are safe for the moment." The real Raven growled every so slightly.

"No you aren't. Quickly, I need you to join with me before I am consumed by the anger, the hatred. I am out of balance...I need each of you." The other Raven's nodded in understanding and surrounded Raven in a circle. In a flash of many colors, the other Raven's disappeared and Raven's eyes no longer glowed with malice but rather had returned to their soft purple.

Raven turned around and started walking toward the limp, bleeding body of the grey cloaked Raven. Raven felt her stomach turn as she looked upon the tattered and broken form of the one who had sacrificed herself to allow her the chance to safe herself. Blood continued to ooze out of an uncountable number of wounds, almost no skin left to cover the torn flesh, empty, bleeding eye sockets no longer seeing anything.

Raven said a silent prayer and reached out her hand. It glowed a soft white and in a flash the grey cloaked Raven was gone, pulled in to the real Raven just like the rest. Raven felt to her knees as she took the pain, the untold suffering into herself once more. She knew she had to accept all aspects of her being, the strong as well as the weak, though she now doubted just how weak that part of her had been. She was whole again. She shook her head...almost whole...almost. She just hoped she was not too late.

Cyborg walked down the hallway of the tower, his heavy feet echoing loudly as he walked toward the infirmary. He was grumbling about having to go check on Robin. He pushed open the door and stepped in, quickly realizing that all the lights had gone out and there was no figure strapped to the bed.

"Ah shit." His arm instantly became his sonic cannon, and he switched his eye over to night vision looking for a very dangerous and deranged psychopath. He scanned the room and could not seem to find anything. He let out a small sigh of relief thinking Robin can run off, he only hoped far away from the tower. Of course he didn't notice the figure emerging from the shadows behind him. Tendrils of red energy lashed out, wrapping themselves around all of his limps tightly, lifting him off the ground.

"What the hell!" Cyborg tired to struggle but couldn't move an inch.

"Foolish, foolish machine." Cyborg was flung into the wall, though the tendrils did not release him. He did however realize that the voice was Raven's, though incredibly strange and evil sounding.

"What the hell is going on hear! Let go of me Raven." A dark chuckle.

"Only a little bit correct machine but it really doesn't matter. You are officially obsolete."

Starfire floated down the hallway, face a complete blank, her emotions all over the place. She wished her Robin was back the way he used to be and continued to curse Raven for her undeniable part in his change. She only hoped that by sending him away for a time, that he could be fixed and would return to her a nicer person, one who would never yell at her...never hurt her. She turned the dark corner and spotted a body lying on the floor, a body she recognized as Robin. She did not run forward immediately, realizing the potential danger of the situation but she could barely hear him calling out to her, calling out for help though his voice sounded very strange.

Starfire rushed over and knelt beside Robin, picking him up so that he was cradled ever so slightly in her arms. She noticed that he was bleeding from deep wounds in his chest and found the slightest bit of panic.

"Oh what has happened to you my love...what did Raven do to you..."

"Starfire..."

"Yes Robin." Starfire never noticed the tendril of energy snaking behind her until it wrapped tightly around her throat, squeezing tightly. Her eyes went wide in horror as Raven's voice came from her beloved's mouth, a sinister grin now there.

"Pucker up princess." Dark laughter echoed everywhere.

Beast Boy sat in the living room, the tv on though he wasn't really watching it. He was lost in thought about Terra, remembering how they used to sit and watch cartoons together, laughing and laughing. However, those times were gone...gone because of those that pushed her away, forced his first love away from him. He jumped ever so slightly as the lights suddenly went out and looked around the room, wondering what had happened. He heard a slight noise to his left and snapped his head in that direction.

"Cyborg?" He suddenly heard a noise to his right and again stared off in that direction

"Starfire?" An object slammed into the side of his head and he saw stars for a few seconds, reaching up his hand to clutch the area of contact. He found the slightest bit of blood coming from a cut.

"If that's you Robin...you've messed with the wrong guy. If its you Raven...don't expect me to go easy on you either. You both are guilty." Another object flew at him, slamming into his side, knocking his breath out of him. He fell to the ground, holding his side. This time when he looked up, he could make out the fact that almost every object in the room was now levitating around him. He heard Raven's dark voice as if it was coming from all places at once.

"No one could have ever loved something as pathetic as you." The objects converged on his helpless body.

Hatred will consume. Hatred has consumed. Nothing can ever be the same.


	9. Chapter 9

1A/N: Really messed up...I think only one more chapter to go...great thanks to everyone that reviewed last chapter. Let me know if I messed anything up.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans, but hey, I think we all knew that already

Doors That Can't Be Closed

Chapter 9

By: Finalitylife

Raven again found her feet touching real ground having returned to her room. A cold, relentless wind flowed through her room from where there was no wall to keep it out, the evidence of what she had tried to do to herself...what she had been driven too. She clenched her tiny hands, feeling more whole at this moment than she had in a very long time though she knew she was far from complete. It was time to fight back...she hoped she could fight back.

Raven floated cautiously threw the darkened hallways, having found out that not a single light in the tower still functioned. She was ready for anything, knowing that anyone at this moment could be a threat to her. Her destination was the infirmary, where she hoped she would find what she sought.

Nothing at this moment in the tower...in the air felt right to Raven, and had it not been for her mind being restricted before, she would have easily noticed those feelings before. The tower had been a darker place for awhile now because of her mistakes.

As she approached the infirmary, she noticed that the doors had been torn from their hinges. She must have been too late. She melded into the darkness and entered and found a war zone. Everything was destroyed, huge dents had been formed in the solid steel walls, Cyborg size dents Raven noted with a grim face. Why her dark side would have attacked one of her 'allies' remained to be seen but Raven assumed it was just out of pure malevolence.

She floated into the lotus position and closed her eyes, reaching out with her mind as she had done once before to save Robin...the choice that started all of this. Raven knew had she not entered Robin's mind then, he more than likely would have perished but in doing so, his prolonged life was nothing but suffering and psychosis that passed into the rest of her friends. Had it been the right choice? She still believed it to be only that she should have been stronger, more aware of her own weaknesses to ensure this tragedy had never occurred. Again she only hoped it was not too late to save them all from herself.

Raven's extended mind finally found what it was looking for though it had taken a great amount of her power to push threw a veil of darkness to get there. Four presences were in the main room, three of them unconscious, and one...one that chilled her to the core.

Raven suddenly felt someone else pushing against her mind and before she could stop it, she could hear her own distorted voice in her mind, images of blood and gore overwhelming her senses.

"Foolish Raven...you really should have taken the easy way out when you had the chance. Now you'll have to watch all of them die, horribly and painfully." Laughter flowed into her mind and Raven finally was able to cut off the connection, pulling her soul self back into her body. She fell to the floor, breathing heavily but she knew there was not much time. She had to get to them now. She took flight with the greatest of urgency.

Raven did not hesitate in the slightest in her path to the main room even though she knew there was undoubtably some type of trap. She flew into the room and stopped at the sight. Hanging to the wall, out cold, suspended by the same red energy that had held the aspects of her personality in her mind were the Titans. Starfire and Beast Boy were covered in gashes everywhere, a steady drip of blood flowing from each them congealing in large pools beneath them, one of Beast Boy's eyes hanging from the socket, still connected by the nerve.. Cyborg's body was dented and broken in some places, an occasional shower of sparks erupting from parts of his body. Starfire had the very unfortunate place of being held next to him, some of the sparks burning into her formerly flawless skin.. She could only feel the slightest signs to life from them, as if they would be gone at any second. The horrifying sight tore deep into Raven on almost every level imaginable.

"Hahahaha. Welcome Raven. I truly was hoping that I would never have to see you alive again but it seems that dream did not come to be." Raven searched for the source of her own voice but was unable to find it.

"They suffered because of you Raven...He suffers because of you." The voice really did seem like it was coming from everywhere.

"You have made all this possible Raven. Had you not created that bond with Robin, I would have not been able to free myself and escape. Had you not developed such a good trust with him, he would have never allowed my entry into his mind. Hahaha...he thought I was you, allowed me in without question...what a fool!" Raven gritted her teeth, clenched her firsts, though she really did feel like breaking down again after seeing her friends, as the truths she suspected were revealed to her.

"At it was so easy once I was inside. He was already cracked up to begin with and I simply fed into his paranoia, his mistrustful nature, helped him justify his own actions and his choices and though not my original idea, I made him believe Slade was after him again. I inflicted wounds upon his body from the inside, very real injuries that made him positive Slade had returned and I slowly tore away at his mind until he no longer could even identify what or who was right in front of him. How quickly he was ready to pay you all back for betraying him when you refused to see what was very real to him, refused to help him."

"He was so afraid of being stabbed in the back...always worried it would eventually come, so easy to convince him it had. It just happened to work out in my favor that it was you he most trusted and it especially broke him when he learned of your 'betrayal.'" A figure seemed to emerge right out of the shadows across the room into a form she recognized instantly. There were claw marks across his bare chest and his hands now resembled sharp claws more than anything else but it was clear as to who it was.

"Robin?" Raven still asked though she already knew the answer. Robin's body greeted her with a cold smile on his face.

"You tell me." Raven could not even describe the incredible strangeness of hearing her own voice coming from Robin's mouth. Robin's hand reached up to the edge of his mask, and slowly peeled it off. Raven couldn't help but think of one of her smallest fantasies she allowed herself...that she would be the one that Robin would first show his eyes too...that he would trust her enough, above everyone else to reveal that highly guarded secret too. However, this time, Raven was not graced with Robin's secret but rather two burning red eyes that pierced right into her soul.

"Come now...you couldn't have expected anything else. Of course if you did, you really are crazy." The calm and leisurely way this...this thing talked to her truly disturbed Raven.

"I'm not crazy...I never was...nor was Robin...it was all your doing."

A loud , mocking laugh emanated from the corrupted Robin's mouth, one born of disbelief and humor all the same.

"I am flattered that you would think me that powerful dear 'sister' but are you truly that delusional, truly that blatantly stupid to believe all that."

"What are you talking about you manipulative monster. Don't stand there and try to pretend you didn't turn all my friends against me. Don't stand there and tell me you didn't try and destroy me!" Another amused laugh.

"Oh yes I did try to destroy you." The cruel and ruthless glare on Robin's face almost made Raven cringe. "I was hoping that you would kill yourself, pathetically take your own life because 'Oh life its so hard, everyone is against me.' The last part was said in a high pitched mockery of her own voice emphasized with taunting hand motions.

"With you dead, I could finally completely separate myself from your being, gaining my freedom permanently. Would it have been an excruciating for me to separate myself? Incredibly. Would it have been worth it? Completely." Raven thought she could almost see her own face in Robin's smiling hungrily.

"I am strong, though I hate to admit it, even I have my limits on what I could do, which is what you seem to be denying even up until this point. You refuse to see the truth."

"What truth?"

"The truth is I did not turn your friends against you. They did it all on their own. I am not powerful enough to control the others from where I resided and it took me up until not that long ago to gain control of Robin's mind. What I did do was simply used our empathic abilities to gently push their true feelings regarding you and each other to the surface where they finally could be expressed." Raven could only look on in horror as Robin's body approached her.

"It should be obvious by now but you haven't been able to figure anything out lately so I guess I'll just tell you. All those horrible words they said to you, all those terrible thoughts you heard from them that drove you toward madness, well I have news for you. There all true, every...single...one."

"Liar!" Raven found herself shaking with anger and outrage and the sheer audacity of her dark side, to actually think she would believe such a thing. Robin's controlled form stared pacing in a circle around her, a large smile on his twisted face.

"I am many things but a liar? I think not. All I did was simply bring the truth to the surface in all of them, the truth that had been festering deep inside for so long, that everyone refused to simply acknowledge. Cyborg really does despise that Robin is the leader, can't stand the fact that you are so cold and distant. Starfire truly does blame you for Robin not already being hers and is very angry at Robin for hurting her. Beast Boy...he is my favorite because the anger and hatred he feels for both you and Robin is amazing. He has no doubt that it is your two faults that Terra is gone...and he loathes you two with every ounce of his being."

"No!"Raven felt her strength slowly dwindling away as her twisted counterpart ripped into her will, bringing her own emotions to the surface...her fears.

"Yes." Robin sneered in her face. "Yes it is all true. I can not create false emotions in them but I can use what was already clearly there. Like I said, I simply allowed hidden truths to be unleashed and you know exactly how it turned out." Robin placed his arms behind his back and continued walking leisurely around Raven's shaking form.

"All I did was set the music and the stage...and you all danced the way you each have wanted to do for so long...just the way I wanted you too. Well almost..." Robin's hand flashed out and a red tendril of energy whipped out, faster than Raven could even register and slashed Raven across the cheek drawing a thin line of blood. She instinctively raised her hand to the cut from an attack that she hadn't even been able to keep up with. Raven's distorted voice floated through the air, in a happy-go-lucky way..

"If that pathetic grey-cloaked waste of brain matter hadn't interfered...well I'm sure you know what would have happened. You can't tell me it wouldn't have been better off with you splattered all over the ground. It would have given you some badly needed color to your skin." Another tendril lashed out and cut Raven across the stomach, still unable to even see them coming, unable to defend herself. She was beginning to realize exactly what she was up against.

She found her head beginning to hang sadly, her eyes squeezed shut. She somehow knew that the words were true...that all those horrible emotions she had felt from the Titans were in fact truly theres and not put there by her darker side. They were not fabricated or placed there by her own anger, her own hatred but rather were as much a part of the Titans as was the thing that was controlling Robin's body at the moment.

After winning in her mind, she so stubbornly believed that all that had occurred had been the work of her devil, and her innocent friends had been forced to be so cruel...so hurting. However, they had not been forced to do anything, had meant every word that came from their mouths.

"With you dead, I would have been free to inhabit Robin, no one knowing I was there. Those hanging weaklings over there would have been real fun to play with." Robin's arm waved toward the three hanging Titans.

"Scream for me why don't you." The slightest bit of life came to all the titans, their mouths opening, high pitched screams of pain piercing threw the air. It still stabbed deep into Raven no matter what she now knew.

"Of course, Robin was the most prized possession in all of this. It is incredible to be in control of one of the most respected heros in all the world, his almost unequaled skills augmenting my great power. I have become unstoppable...not even you can oppose me though I guess you could try. But of course then you'd be risking hurting Robin and I know you won't do that." Raven could only look at the ground, not wanting to look upon the corrupted visage of the one she held the most dear in her heart.

She suspected that if it came down to it, she could defeat Robin in battle but Robin with her dark power, knowing she would have to hold back in a fight to avoid hurting him...it could not be done. She would have to try something else...hope that an opportunity would present itself to do what she needed to do.

"Oh I could have had so much fun...but instead I had to alter my plans just a tad bit though I doubt the outcome will be any different." Another slash across Raven's leg, causing her to struggle for a second to maintain her balance, still not looking up as her body continued to burn from the wounds being inflicted upon her by a more powerful opponent.

"You will die here today Raven...all the Titans will die here today...well except one. Your beloved Robin will suffer an unending waking nightmare as he gets to watch his body destroy everything innocent and pure in this world while trapped within his own mind. I'm sure he is greatly appreciative to now know that all his suffering is entirely your fault. He should have gone with his instincts and never trusted a thing like you. Would have saved everyone a lot of trouble." Raven did not respond.

Robin's body shrugged its shoulder. "Oh well." Red tendrils wrapped all over Raven's body, starting to squeeze, beginning to cut into her own body. Robin's body walked toward Raven, Raven's darker side filled with nothing but arrogance and malice as her opponent so easily submitted to her fate after learning all she had. A terrifying grin crossed Robin's face as a gruesome idea formed within the dark controller of the once great protector of all innocent.

"I know you desire this body Raven, that is no secret to even one who was locked deep in the darkness of your mind. How about a little treat, a parting gift for one as worthless and unloved as you." The dark Robin leaned forward, Robin's face a mere inch from Raven's face, flicking his tongue out against her ear lobe and whispered into Raven's ear. Its guard had been let down, its confidence overwhelming.

"How would you like to be the first person ever to actually be forcibly defiled by their own self." Claws caressed Raven's body, where no one had the right to touch her without her permission.

"Who knows, you might actually enjoy it."

Raven had found her moment..her one and only chance to end this. Raven's darker side was surprised when Raven's head snapped up, a burning fury in her purple eyes, a righteous fury that would have put Starfire to shame. Her hands shot up, glowing with white energy and grasped tightly on to the sides of Robin's head. The darker side instantly felt pain, instantly felt its clarity of mind, its control be shaken.

"This ends now. You are nothing but a twisted parasite." Robin's body struggled vainly against the iron clad grip to no avail. The tendrils wrapped around Raven drew themselves tighter, more blood being freed, falling to the ground but Raven took no notice.

"You can not allowed to be free...you can not be allowed to hurt anyone else!" Raven's eyes burned white as another surge of energy pulsed into Robin's mind, trying to force a very painful separation of two entities. Robin's body continued to lash out at Raven with his arms along with red energy though Raven endured the punches...the cuts...the pain because...because there simply was no other choice.

"You are nothing but a bad dream but you are my bad dream, and you must be returned to your proper place within me."

"Let go of me! I will not go back I will not go back. I will not let you lock me away again! I won't!" Raven increased her power into Robin's tattered mind with a determined look on her face even as a clawed hand started viciously and desperately tearing in to her face.

"It is not your choice because you are only a part of me. I control you, not the other way around and it is time you go back where you belong!"

"NOOOOOO!" An sphere of white and red energy expanded out from the two forms and in a flash of destructive emotion, an massive explosion erupted, instantly shattering every window in the tower.

The darkness had returned from whence it came. Nothing would ever be the same, not for anyone.


	10. Chapter 10

1A/N: Well its done. An odd ending to a strange story. I guess take nothing at face value nor disregard it as such. I don't think I can ever get endings the way I want to but I guess that's just a flaw in my writing. Was this story a success? I think so. From what I can tell, I accomplished what I set out to do and that's really all that matters. Well that and producing something people don't want to kill you for. Anyways, thanks to everyone who reviewed, and the fact that quite a few of the reviewers our exceptional writers in their own right really makes me think this endeavor was a good thing. I received a lot of nice comments from you guys and really, I can't thank you enough. Well with this story coming to a close, that probably means I'll be starting something new pretty soon which may be in your interest or not so I guess keep an eye out. Well again thanks to everyone who actually gave a damn about this and enjoy this final chapter. Peace.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans, but hey, I think we all knew that already

Doors That Can't Be Closed

Chapter 10

By: Finalitylife

Raven P.O.V:

The battle had been won, if what happened can ever be called a victory. My dark side had been forced from Robin's mind, its control severed, and its being had been forcibly pulled back into my mind. The other emotions within my mind were very happy to see the now very weakened part of myself. She paid dearly for her actions, for their suffering, for what had been done to the grey cloaked Raven. Once again she has been shackled deep within my mind, though this time I am far more careful in acknowledging her presence. She is never to be forgotten about again, no longer can I pretend she is not there...a strong part of me.

A great deal of my energy had been released to accomplish what I did, energy that was not tainted by the darkness within that I still can't help but hate, only serving to keep that aspect of me strong. The energy has done a great service in healing Starfire and Beast Boy, though could do nothing for the mechanical body of Cyborg. It had probably saved their lives and I was grateful for that unexpected outcome of the battle.

Cyborg had been the first one to awaken, strange yet understandable expression on his face. He found himself only half able to function. Starfire and Beast Boy awoke not much later, the same looks on their face, Beast Boy helping Starfire uncertainly to her feet. They themselves, like me, still were coming to grips with what had actually happened, not even sure who was an enemy or not at this moment. They had been attacked viciously by Robin, but he had undoubtably had my voice and powers that resembled my own. Who can blame them for being utterly and completely confused.

What they found however was in no way a threat. Sitting in the middle of the room, with Robin's head cradled in my lap was me, tears flowing without hesitation down my face. Every so often, one of the few remaining objects in the room would explode, my emotions once again bringing their chaotic results from their expression, though I simply did not care.

I could feel each of their eyes upon me though I did not say anything, did not even move. A mask had once again been placed over Robin's eyes...eyes that would have been so perfect except they were so very empty now, so very lifeless despite his chest still shallowly moving. I did not want anyone else to see his eyes as they were.

Robin, for the first time in a very long time, was completely free...no longer being affected by mind altering dust...no longer being manipulated and controlled by my own darkness. However, there was no Robin there, not anymore.

The three other Titans slowly approached, tentatively, cautiously, and with a returning understanding of what had exactly happened. Their eyes had never left me, never once braking their strange contact with my crying form, my own eyes refusing to leave Robin's face. That would soon change.

"Is it true?" My own voice was dry and ragged, barely coming out. They did not respond. My eyes snapped away from Robin, a desperate plea once again coming from my very soul. I already knew the answer but I still needed to ask it.

"Is it true?" Each of their eyes widened for a second as I now looked upon them, my hair shifting out of my face revealing the lasting gift of my dark side. All my wounds that had been inflicted upon me had healed as well leaving no mark, no proof that they were even there, yet my dark side's final, desperate attack had not faded away in the least. Her claw had viciously ripped apart the left side of my face, gouged and tore the flesh deep and relentlessly. I had not seen it yet but I know what was there, my dark side having provided the horrible image to me as a final disgrace. The left side of my face was a patchwork of hideous and jagged scars, marring my once flawless pale skin.

These scars would never fade, would never leave even with the aide of my magical healing power. My dark side had sacrificed a piece of its own strength into that final attack to ensure my powers would be useless, to ensure I would permanently and forever be disfigured. It is truly amazing what cruelty exists within me.

After a brief few seconds of shock, the Titans finally broke their gaze from my face, their eyes falling to the floor in front of them, each one refusing to meet my pleading eyes, or maybe, they just simply couldn't. They had answered my question...my dark side had not lied. It had all been true...it had all been true. My eyes fell slowly back to Robin's face which had not shown the slightest movement or expression since he was freed from my own evil influence. I lowered my head and gently placed a kiss on his forehead. I gently moved his head from my lap setting it on the ground and stood to my feet. I raised my hood to shroud my face, not wanting anyone to look at it ever again. The Titans still refused to look upon him.

"I know I have no right to ask anything from you...but this is not for me. Robin needs help...but please, please do not send him away, do not send him away to strangers. He needs to be somewhere he is familiar with...around people he knows...do not send him away from his home here." Cyborg finally looked up at him and gaze me the slightest of nods. I turned around and started floating away. Cyborg tentatively called out.

"Wait...are you leaving?"

"Yes. I...I can't stay here anymore...not after knowing what I know, not after becoming what I did. I need to get away from all of it."

"But Rae, things can get better, we can fix this right." I turned my head slowly back around and for a second, I saw the face of a Cyborg who smiled at me as he made me breakfast instead of one who inwardly resented me and my distant nature.. One in the same just as the monster who hurt them all was me. Right now that fact was just too clear to me. I did not say anything, but only disappeared into black energy.

Were the Titans actually my friends...yes, I believe they were but we were never as close as we claimed to be, never as tight as friends really should have been. We hid so much from each other and we ignorantly believed there was nothing lying underneath the surface, never truly questioned each other's feelings and thoughts. We had been unable to truly be honest and deal with our own issues, our fears, and our concerns. We had, for the most part, been five strangers who did a very good job at pretending to be friends because it was easier that way, easier than being alone, easier than dealing with feelings no one wanted to admit to having. It took a forced reckoning by my dark side to bring it out in the open and I...I could no longer live in the comfortable lie, pretend that everything was alright so I left...I left the first place in a very long time I could call home. Right now , I could not look at them.

I find myself flying toward the tower in the pitch black of night, again on one of my unseen journeys. I find it hard to not think about them despite everything that had happened, despite everything I knew because I hated the loneliness. I ponder going back, knowing three of the Titans would probably accept me back...though I knew it would be more out of guilt than anything. Of course I wonder if they have learned to deal with what they had felt, had learned to move past it, and have truly changed for the better. Another one of my dreams born of the loneliness of my life because I didn't even know if I had learned to move past it all.

I phase through the walls of the tower, heading down a few floors toward my destination. There was one Titan who never resented me though he was never truly honest. His hatred toward me was born of deceit and his own fears and issues and I can not find myself able to fault him for that. I miss him...I miss him terribly though I know that boy who I cared for so very much is gone forever.

Robin survived physically but his mind had simply shattered from the combined efforts of the dust as well as my dark side. It all had simply been too much to handle for someone who already dwelled so deeply in his own darkness. The problem is that when a mind breaks as his did, shatters so completely, it is not only impossible to put it back together exactly as it was, it is simply not possible to even find all the pieces. The Robin who was can never exist again for the sum of his parts will never exactly equal what he once was. However, that does not mean his entire being is lost forever.

Cyborg had kept his promise and not sent Robin away, but rather created a place for him to dwell within the tower. The best doctors in the world were brought in to help him, to help bring back at least his sanity and his stability. He was making progress, I knew first hand.

It had been a whole week before Robin even moved again and he had instantly lashed out at those around him, finally curling up in a corner, mumbling to himself about the darkness coming to get him. I had not been there to see it. I had not made my first secret visit to the fallen Titan until another two weeks later, when I finally worked up the courage to see him. I was greatly responsible for his condition, and I was afraid of how he would react to seeing me.

Robin resided in a padded room that was as close a recreation to his old room as it could be, though there was really nothing there he could potentially harm himself with. They did not want to treat him as a prisoner or a mental patient, but knew he could still be very dangerous to himself as well as others. He still hated to be in the darkness, demanding that light be on at all times, and that was granted to him.

I remember the first time I had visited him. He had been cowering in a corner, mumbling the same two lines over and over again, "Raven caused all this but Raven saved me. Which one was it?" He still could not distinguish between me and my dark side, was unable to understand it was not me who had consciously hurt him, though I was indeed responsible for much of his plight. Though his mind was broken, his senses were still strong and he had quickly realized my presence was there. He had slowly looked up at me, trying to see my face covered heavily by my hood. He quietly said my name as he looked at me, before springing forward, tackling me to the ground. He pinned my arms down and growled at me.

"Come back to finish the job Raven. Well I won't let it happen." My hood had fallen down during the attack, and I cringed as my tattered face was revealed once again to the light. Robin slowly had taken notice of me, as I made no effort to resist, made no effort to attack. He seemed to study my face for a few seconds before his grip out my loosened.

"Raven...who hurt you..." I watched as his body slowly fell over off of me and he curled up, screaming about how it was him who had done that to me. Eventually he calmed down, though he didn't move, only continued to shake slowly on the ground. I used my power to put him to bed, not willing to try and touch him. I watched him sleep restlessly for about an hour, as he continued to mumble in his sleep. The last thing I heard before I left was 'I'm sorry Raven.' All I could do was tell him how very sorry I was too.

Following the first visit, I continued to come back every week to see him, as much to help him as I think I was trying to help myself, to fight the loneliness. Some visits went terribly wrong with him attacking me badly in anger, leaving me bruised and beaten on the ground before he would realize what he had done, falling into a hysterical mess on the ground. I accepted his punches without question because I knew I deserved them. He would always scream at me for keeping my hood up, that I was always trying to hide things from him, and he was the only person I willingly removed my hood for, revealing my dark reminder of what I had let my dark side do, a reminder of everyone's mistakes.

Other visits, when he was more friendly and lucid, went well and he would ask me how I was doing, how things were at the tower, if I had read any good books lately. I never had the heart to tell him I had left or the truth of why I had and he never asked why I only came once a week. When he was in moods like that, I simply let him be.

As I stood at the door to his room, I truly hoped today would be one of those good days. I phased through the door into his room, and was surprised to find a little less light today, a sign that he was probably having a good day. He was seated on his bed as if he was expecting me, a contemplative look on his face.

"Robin." I greet him quietly with only his name. He looks up at me, as if trying to ask a question that he couldn't get off his lips. I wait for it, knowing the first question usually gave me insight into what would occur this evening.

"I'm crazy aren't I Raven." It is the first time he has ever asked me something like that. I could easily just say yes but I don't.

"No more than me Robin, but you can't be crazy if you know you are." He seems to study my form for a second before nodding.

"Catch-22." I am unable to repress the smile at the reference. It is a book that Robin suggested I read, far before everything went to hell. I had not been a fan, but I did respect the books message.

"Could you lower your hood Raven. I miss being able to see your face...your lovely face." I do not move immediately, completely confused by his actions this evening, but eventually and very reluctantly, I lower my hood. He smiles at me as I do so. Other than the very first visit, Robin has never once acknowledged my disfigurement and sometimes I wonder if he can even see it in his jumbled mind, if he really just doesn't see me as he remembers me from before.

"Thank you Raven." I stand and he sits in silence for a few minutes, me looking at the floor, his eyes upon me. Finally he breaks the silence.

"So you left the tower awhile back Raven. Do you really think that was for the best?" I am unable to hide my surprise at him saying this and he answers my unspoken question.

"Cyborg told me...he also knows that you come to visit me. He says he thinks its good for both of us." I continue to look at the floor, unsure of where this is all going.

"Could you...could you come sit beside me Raven?" I finally look up at him and his face looks very soft and gentle, like a child who needed a hug. I give him a small nod and sit beside him, settling into the soft mattress. Again I am confounded when he leans over and lays his head on my shoulder, letting out a soft sigh as he does so.

"When are you going to come home Raven?"

"I don't know if I ever can Robin."

"That makes me sad." His voice is very light, very drawn out, almost making it sound like he is on drugs, and who is to say he isn't. The doctors probably raised his dosage hoping it would help get his mood swings under control. I lower my head as I speak, so wanting to raise my hood again.

"I'm sorry Robin." I am surprised by the sudden feelings of warmth as he reaches over and grabs my hand very gently.

"No need to apologize Raven. We are all responsible for things being the way they are. If it hadn't happened as it did, it would have more than likely happened some other way though I doubt it would have been as bad as it was, of course it could have been worse." He sounds like he is rambling, like he is in his own little world, seeing things that only he can see, and once again, who is to say he isn't. I want to pull my hand away from him but I find myself unable to reject the warmth. This visit is the first time he has touched me that wasn't violent. I can't help but feel selfishly happy about that.

"Many things were broken Raven, things that were already cracked, but that does not mean they can't be fixed, can't be made better than they once were." I can't help but smile slightly at Robin's blind optimism. I had forgotten what it sounded like.

"Things are never that simple Robin. I think you know that." He snuggles a little into my shoulder, and gives my hand a squeeze.

"I know...I know but still, there nice thoughts...much nicer thoughts than I usually have." I return the squeeze with my hand, silently reprimanding myself for trying to argue with him, for working to undone his good mood.

"Raven?" His voice is very gentle, almost barely there, his body tense.

"Yes Robin?"

"Can you come back tomorrow? I always feel better when I get to see you and I'm afraid...I'm afraid tomorrow I won't be in such a good mood." I answer without a moment of hesitation.

"Of course Robin."

"And the next day?" I can't help but smile at his eager sounding voice.

"I'll be here whenever you need me Robin." His body loses its tension and he moves until he is lying on the bed on his side, with his head resting in my lap.

"Thank you Raven...They miss you when you are not here...I miss you when you're not here. I need my Raven." His last words are barely audible as he drifts off to sleep. I find myself gently moving the hair from his face as he sleeps so I can see the peaceful look on his face. It is the first time I have ever seen him like this, it is the first time I have ever felt so peaceful. I find myself quietly humming a lullaby as I continue to look at Robin with a smile.

"Thank you Robin...Thank you..." Tomorrow I would be here to greet Robin when he wakes up, like the dawn greets the world with its warm embrace for a brand new day.


End file.
